Birth of the Female Hawkeye
by Evenstar gal
Summary: Pre-Civil War. In the comic verse, there's Kate Bishop. In the MCU, a girl name Sammy Stan happens to fall into the Marvel Universe. She dies a tragic death and awakens at the Avengers Tower. Clint Barton offers to make her his new apprentice due to his recent retirement. How does a dorky human transform into a deadly hero? Read and find out. Eventual Steve RogersXOC.
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 **Chapter One**

 **Letter One- January 1** **st** **, 2017- Sunday- Morning**

 _Hello, my name is Samantha Stan. People who know me usually call me Sammy. I don't know who will be reading these letters. I'm planning to keep a diary of my experiences here. Honestly, I don't know where to start except from the beginning. I died. Yes, you heard me correctly. My heart stopped beating. After a horrible car accident, I was sent to the hospital in critical condition. I didn't make it through the night. I don't remember much about my time in the light, but by some miracle, I was given a second chance to live. Before I knew what was happening, I woke up in front of the Avengers tower. I am in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. I'm in a different version of Earth. I don't know who found me first. All of that is kind of a blur. My injuries and scars have carried on to this universe. S.H.I.E.L.D has had me under surveillance for 24 hours, demanding answers about whom I am and where I come from. After that excruciating period, I was finally released into the care of the Avengers. I'm in a building full of characters I've loved since forever. This isn't a dream. This is my new reality._

 _In a world full of Earth's Mightiest Heroes, I'm just an average twenty three year old girl._

 _Initially in the crash, I died from blunt force trauma to my cranium. There are scars and cuts littered all over my body. Sadly, I'll have to live with those reminders._

 _The most tragic part is that I'll never see my old family or friends again. In my version of Earth, super heroes don't exist. All of those stories were myths and legends._

 _Here I am in the flesh. No one here knows where I've come from. A girl's got to have some mystery to her._

 _I'm in my own tiny apartment inside of the Stark Tower/Avengers Tower. Pepper Potts has been so kind and accommodating since my arrival. She helped me move into this apartment, and she went as far as buying me all the essentials, like clothes and hygienic products that I need._

 _I'm not sure of what the Avengers will think of my presence here. I guess I'll find out once I finally step out of this apartment to explore the tower._

 _Love,_

 _Sammy_

* * *

There was a knock on Sammy's door.

For about a minute straight, Samantha Stan intensely stared at the door. Either there was an enemy or a hero on the other side of that door. Her heart raced as the anxiety set in. What was she even doing here? She was the world's biggest chicken. She was a cowardly little girl in a building full of super heroes. She glanced in the mirror, seeing that she wasn't a complete utter mess. She looked presentable enough. Who was she trying to kid? With the big geeky hipster glasses and coveralls, she was the definition of a dork. She was a short petite little thing. Her nose was too big in proportion to her face. Her dark black hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail. Her brown eyes were also big. No one would see a girl that looked like her on the runway of fashion week. She wasn't too skinny or huge. She was certainly a unique gal.

"Is anyone still alive in there?" a familiar voice asked.

"Holy fuckballs!" Sammy exclaimed, covering her mouth after she realized what she'd said.

Her idol, her favorite super hero in the Marvel Universe was standing right outside her door. Any normal functioning person would have opened the damn thing already.

"I guess that answers that question," Hawkeye said, chuckling under his breath. "Next question, are you going to let me in? I was kind of sent here to check on you, and that requires that I actually SEE you."

She opened the door with her jaw dropped open. She was totally embarrassing herself. She choked back her excitement and tried not to act like a total fangirl.

"Hi, come in!" she squeaked, cringing on the inside.

"Clint," he introduced himself, holding out his hand to her.

Again like an idiot, she stared down at his hand for an awkward amount of time.

Another century passed and finally she reached out and shook his hand.

"Sammy," she mumbled out, shaking like a nervous freak.

She was shy…painfully so. Social interaction was not her strong suit. Her specialty was more along the lines of burying her face in a book or singing songs that no one else would ever hear.

There was a certain air of confidence to Clint Barton. He was one of the best S.H.I.E.L.D agents out there, but he was also a pain in the ass. He smirked at her nervous response, eyeing her up and down. He raised an eyebrow at her messy apartment. Her things were basically thrown everywhere. There was no sense of organization to the place. She was a tiny, awkward, and dorky ball of chaos. He shoved his hands into his jean pockets, flopping down on to her couch like he owned the place. He was curious about this mystery new girl. It wasn't every day that girls just suddenly fell out of the sky. She wasn't a striking beauty, but he thought she was sort of cute in her own right. He grinned as she gawked at him.

"I'm sure you're wondering why I'm here," he said.

"That would be nice to know."

"Well, I was the one that found you," he informed her, relaxing into the comfy couch. "I'm here because I want to get to know you, little peach."

"Don't call me that!"

"It's too late," he said. "There's no going back now! So, tell me your entire life story. I have all day just so you know. I'm not leaving till I get a sense of who you are. I'm here to protect the people, and I can't protect them if you're a potential threat."

"Fury wouldn't have let me get this far if I were a danger to all of you!" she argued, glaring at him like he was the worst kind of human being.

He barked out a laugh.

"You do have a little fire in you," he told her. "All you needed was a little motivation. I think you and I will get along just fine. However, I need the truth. I'm human, and you're human. We do have that much in common. I gather that you're having a hard time. You're in a new and unfamiliar place. S.H.I.E.L.D surrounded you like you were the human form of Area 51. Something in your eyes tells me that you have a story to tell, and I am a great listener. So just come take a seat next to me."

She was beyond overwhelmed. Her brain was having a total meltdown, and her anxiety was reaching its peak. She gasped as he playfully yanked her down on to the couch next to him, acting like they were familiar friends already. She closed her eyes tightly, counting backwards from ten like her Father had taught her back when she was a kid. She was thankful as Clint stayed silent throughout her mini panic attack. His hand was gentle and steady on her back as she took in a couple of deep breaths. Once she was feeling steady, her eyes squinted at him in annoyance.

"Was that necessary?"

"Come on, girlfriend. You just need to take a chill pill," he said, clapping her on the back. "I'm not as scary as I look."

He was the perfect picture of attractive, but he wasn't her type. Also, he was married to the lovely Laura Barton. She was aware of his family tucked away on a farm.

"I just met you. I'm not exactly prepared to share every dark secret with you," she said.

"By your initial reaction, I get the feeling that you know who I am. I'd like to know a bit more about you. You and I should balance out the playing field here," he replied.

The light mood in her suddenly shifted to something darker. The night of her death was etched into her soul. Her memory had blocked the memory of her fall into the Marvel World, but she remembered how she died.

"Will you promise to take me serious? I don't want you to laugh or say something snarky," she requested.

"Pinky promise," he answered, linking his pinky with hers.

The move was cheesy, but it made her smile for just a moment.

"I was on a road trip on my way to see my parents. I love my family, but we had our differences. I didn't exactly get along with them all the time. I have my Mother's stubbornness, and I probably resemble her most in looks and personality. You know how women love to be right, and we hate to be wrong. She and I fought way too much." She frowned, looking down at her folded hands in her lap. She trembled at the memory of what came next. "I was about twenty minutes away from my childhood home. My family was initially from the city, but when I was born, we moved out to the country. I love to drive at night, mainly due to less traffic. It was night time, and it was raining. Somehow I'd lost control of my vehicle. There must have been a puddle or a dip in the road. My car swerved, avoiding the guardrail. My car did a complete 360, and the passenger side of my car slammed right into the side of a mountain. Many people have died on that deadly road. Surviving would have made me the miracle girl. Sadly, I didn't make it. A truck of technicians stumbled upon me and my car. They called 911. I was raced down to the local hospital. I was in critical condition that night and I passed away in my sleep. I don't know if you believe in God or Heaven. I don't have any kind of religion. I didn't know what to expect. I was brave, and I stepped into the light. My memories are fuzzy from there, but I ended up here."

"I'm sorry."

"You're taking this last part of my story to your grave, Hawkeye," she said, reaffirming the fact that yes she did know who he was. "The previous year before my death, I ran away from home. I got in a terrible fight with my Mother. She'd said a lot of things she hadn't meant. I struggled to forgive her the moment she said I wasn't her daughter anymore. The regret set in, and she tried to chase after me. I was already gone. My best friend took me in, and I lived with her for that period of time. I didn't tell my parents I was coming home. I wanted to surprise them for Christmas. My soul was in purgatory for quite a while. I was on my way to apologize. I was ready to forgive and move on." Now it was the New Year.

"Why are you telling me all of this? All I needed was the basics," he said, trying to read her face.

"Because I actually hope you'll come to respect me one day. Maybe if I'm lucky, I'll be able to call you friend." She looked away, processing all that had happened. "Why are you here? I may not know you personally since I just technically met you, but I do know enough. You're supposed to be retired. "

"Little Peach, this used to be my apartment. I was here to pick up a few items I left behind. Before I knew what was going on, you fell right in front of me. You startled me. It's not every day that a normal human girl just falls out of the sky," he said. "I waited about a week after you fell, and then I decided today was the time to come back."

"Are you really going to turn in your bow and arrow? Not to add to your ego, but you're my favorite Avenger by far," she said.

"You and I were destined to meet. It must be fate!" He grasped one of her hands in his, giving it a comforting squeeze. "Yes, I think it's time to just live my life. I want to be there for my wife and kids."

"Who will take your place?" she questioned.

"Are you offering to take my place?" he asked, avoiding he answer to her question.

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't say no," he pointed out, looking excited at the possibilities.

"I just got here, Barton. Technically, I shouldn't even exist!"

"That's the beauty of it! You have a beautiful opportunity to start over. You obviously didn't succeed in saving yourself, but you can start by helping other people. It'll help you build character. Give you an actual backbone."

"Ouch." It was true. She was the awkward duckling to his confident self.

"If I didn't believe in Natasha, where would she be now? You deserve an equal chance to find redemption," he said. Like he'd seen in Natasha Romanov, he detected something inside of Samantha Stan. His gut instinct tended to be right. He'd risked his career for Natasha. She was Auntie Nat to his kids. He had a bad habit of taking in strays.

He was human, and he'd accomplished becoming an Avenger. Sammy was human, too, and there was no reason why she wouldn't be able to at least try.

"Give me a day to think on it," she requested.

"I'll see you tomorrow then." He gathered up his things and left the apartment, leaving her alone with her thoughts for the rest of the day.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 **Chapter Two**

 **Letter Two- January 2** **nd** **, 2017- Monday**

 _Dear Diary (Ha!),_

 _I can't believe that I'm even keeping a consistent diary for once in my life. It feels like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders right now._

 _What is the definition of redemption?_

" _The action of saving or being saved from sin, error, or evil."_

 _Is this my one chance for redemption?_

 _Was Hawkeye right?_

 _The answer is….possibly yes._

 _Fear is holding me back from what I truly want. I want to feel like I belong to this world, and that is a selfish thing to want. I don't fit in. I'm practically a walking example of a bad Mary Sue character._

 _There's a scar on my neck that isn't healing up quite as nicely as the others. Whenever I touch the scar, I feel the rough skin beneath my fingertips. Whenever I see or feel the scar, I just remember my pain. There is so much regret on my part. Somedays I feel like the grief will swallow me whole. My parents will never know that I forgave them. Did anyone bother to throw me a funeral service back home? That's another mystery I can't even begin to unravel. It feels like I haven't had a REAL home in forever. I wish I could have said goodbye to everyone one last time._

 _I'm sure you'll take this other secret to my grave. I cried my first night here in the Marvel Universe. I wasn't excited or enthused like those Mary Sue characters you read about in Fanfiction on the internet. I wasn't immediately liked by everyone. In fact, I'm pretty sure Nick Fury hates me on some level. I'm the unknown wild card._

 _I can at least thank Fury for not killing me. No one would have gone looking for me that day._

 _I was honest with Fury to an extent._

 _I was very honest with Clint Barton._

 _Today is the turning point in my brand new life._

 _Today I choose to step out of this apartment. I expect that Clint will be anticipating my answer to his offer. I could decide to share the title of Hawkeye with Clint Barton. What if I fail? What if I accidentally break up the Avengers with my presence? What if a screw up the timeline? There are so many what ifs. It's driving me insane._

 _Am I worthy of becoming an Avenger?_

 _If I try to lift Thor's Hammer would he try to kill me?_

 _Hmmm, I guess I don't really need to know the answer to that last question. I'm quirky but not suicidal. I'm a stranger to the Avengers, but I'm a fan girl with zero death wishes._

 _Damn it! I feel like I'm that lame kid that's nervous on the first day of school. What if nobody likes me besides Clint? What if Black Widow decides to assassinate me in my sleep? I really hope Clint will grant me some sort of protection. I'm human, and I don't feel like dying a second time this soon. Who is going to train me?_

 _The ultimate question is….what if I don't succeed and I disappoint Clint?_

 _I've only known Clint for less than twenty four hours, and I don't want to disappoint my hero. Having his trust means something to me._

 _I guess now is the time._

 _I'm going to take the plunge now into the world._

 _Wish me luck._

 _Love,  
Sammy_

* * *

The sun in the sky dropped. The lights in the tower were dimmed, and Sammy felt like this was the perfect time of day to search and explore. She assumed most of everyone else in the building was already tucked away in their beds. Her bare feet touched the smooth glass surface of the floors. Everything in the tower was intricate and stunning. Of course she expected no less from the lifestyle of a playboy billionaire like Tony Stark. It was just too bad that he and Pepper didn't make it work as a couple. As she walked around, she stumbled into what looked like a living room area.

There was a big screen TV and a comfy white sofa set. To the right of the living room, there was an open bar. This common area looked great for potential parties.

She gasped as someone grabbed her from behind. She twisted around with her left fist flying, but someone blocked her hit.

She rolled her eyes.

Clint Barton's steely grey eyes were trained on her face. He appeared to be pleased at her response time. "At least you seem to have some sort of sense of self preservation," he said.

"Can you just say hello like a normal person?" she asked.

"I march to the beat of my own drum, Little Peach," he told her, using his annoying nickname for her.

"Your wife must be one tough lady," she commented. He was a handful, and she wasn't equipped to deal with that much sass. She liked to keep to herself. She wasn't a social butterfly.

"Have you thought about my offer?" He needed to know if she was ready to take on this task.

She nodded, running her hand through her messy hair. She was nervous, but she'd come prepared with an answer.

"Yes, I'm willing to give things a shot," she said.

"Little Peach, your very first mission is to gain the approval of at least one of the Avengers. I'm giving you a week to charm them." He ignored her nervous twitch. "I need you to break out of that shell of yours, and this is the perfect time to start. I'm not training you until I know you're mentally prepared to take on the task. Having a partner or several allies is a necessity. You need to make connections with people you trust. Your final test won't be easy, but I'm not spoiling that for you quite yet."

"I accept the challenge," she replied. She grimaced and twitched as her nerves jumped around.

"Also, I'm crashing on your couch for the night. Goodnight, Little Peach!" Clint slapped her on the back before running off down one of the hallways.

Okay, so she was temporarily going to share an apartment with her favorite super hero. She wasn't sure whether to be pleased or slightly creeped out.

She shrugged deciding that it was no big deal.

"I can do this," she whispered to herself. How hard would it be to make at least one friend? She sighed. Clint was already acting like the big brother figure in her life. Her biological brother Ian had hated her before she passed on. He'd been the first baby of the Stan family. She'd been the unexpected baby. Jealousy had run deep between the two siblings. The dysfunction existed in the Stan family clan. At one point, she'd been convinced that her family was cursed.

She was on her own now with a fresh start. She was going to make the best out of a disastrous situation. No more time for crying or weeping.

"What am I doing?" she asked herself. She had this horrible tendency to say her thoughts out loud. When she was living with her best friend, it hadn't been an issue. No one had been around to care. She glanced down at her brand new cell phone which had zero contacts in it. It was nearing 3 o'clock in the morning. There was noise coming from behind her. Her heart literally stopped, and she gasped. Was this real? She pinched herself. She tried to appear real casual, but he didn't seem to notice her yet.

"Captain," she said, trying to catch his attention.

Captain America was too distracted.

The legend and hero, Steve Rogers, walked past her to get into the kitchen. He of course wasn't in uniform. His blonde hair was a bit ruffled. He was in a white wife beater and low waist gray sweats. Once she got past her awe, she noted the distress in his eyes. He appeared to be upset. She silently followed, hoping he wouldn't get mad. He finally noticed her, stopping in his steps. He was right in the door way to the kitchen. The two stared each other down. He didn't look happy to see her.

"Is there anything I can help you with, ma'am?" Steve asked. He was thoroughly polite despite his sour mood.

"No, I'm okay." She visibly cringed. "I didn't think anyone else was awake."

There was silence.

This was the calm before the storm.

"This isn't the place for a dame like you," He told her, narrowing his sharp gaze at her.

"I get that you're the leader or whatever, but that doesn't give you permission to be an ass!" she snapped. Normally she avoided confrontation. She was shocked by her own actions. Maybe Clint Barton was rubbing off on her. She was supposed to be "charming." She was definitely going to get a big fat F on her first assignment. "You don't know who I am or what I've been through. I've never personally met you, but I've heard about you. I don't know what you've heard about ME, but you seem to already have an opinion about me."

"I don't trust you," Steve said, making his statement very clear.

"I don't expect you to right away. Just because you're America's Sweetheart doesn't mean that I trust you either. You're a war hero. You're the first Avenger! I should be so honored to meet you. Trust me, I am. This wasn't the way I wanted to meet you though. I may not like the hand that universe has dealt me, but I'm running with my gut instinct. I can prove to you that I belong here. Just give me a chance."

"You're not what I expected," he confessed.

"I'm not like most girls, and I'm not like most people. Just because I'm d _ifferent_ doesn't mean I'm any less qualified. "Sammy wasn't stunningly beautiful like Sharon or Peggy Carter. She wasn't sophisticated like Pepper Potts. She was for sure nowhere near as smart as Jane Foster. She wasn't lethal and deadly like Natasha Romanov. She was the Plain Jane dorky gal. "Please, just give me a chance."

He nodded, pulling a glass out of the cabinet. He walked over to the fridge and poured himself a glass of milk. He was used to the kitchen being empty this time of night. This was his usual alone time. He couldn't relax with a complete stranger in his home, and the stranger happened to be a very interesting dame. He paused at the multiple scars on her body.

She was the girl that fell out of the sky.

She didn't look like a monster or an alien.

There was eagerness and innocence to her. She appeared to be confused by his sudden change of heart. The way he looked at her made her feel all squishy inside.

She shoved that fleeting thought aside. She started to walk away, trying to mentally lick her wounds. Her ego was wounded by his mistrust.

"Stay." Steve pulled out one of the kitchen stools, motioning for her to sit down.

She moved to sit down on the stool next to him.

She left the Captain alone to his thoughts, and he silently observed her.

For the next few hours the two just sat in a comfortable silence.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 **Chapter Three**

 **Letter Three- January 3rd, 2017- Tuesday**

 _Dear Diary, (Clint I know you're reading my Diary!)_

 _If you're reading this right now Clint Barton, I guess I don't really care. You're the one that's asleep on my couch. Just make yourself at home, Hawkeye! I guess we're basically the same person now, or at least we'll be sharing the same super hero title. You're a real pain in my ass so far, Clint, but I kind of like you, so count your blessings. I'm choosing to trust you, coming from me that's miracle in itself. I would be lost in this tower without you. So far I'm epically failing my first assignment. Our FEARLESS leader has zero desire to trust me. Steve and I had a nice moment for a bit where we just sat next to each other in peace. Maybe that's a small step in the right direction. I don't have your natural Hawkeye charm. I'm shy and not a loud mouth._

 _My biological brother hated me in my past life. You're the brother I've always wanted. Please don't let me down. Also, don't let Black Widow murder me in my sleep. She doesn't trust me anymore than CAP does. I'm depending on you to protect me until I succeed in becoming Hawkeye. This isn't like the terrible Fan Fiction I used to read back home. I'm getting zero instant gratification from most of you guys._

 _I can count on my one hand how many people like me._

 _You_

 _Pepper Potts_

 _If I were a Fan Fiction writer, I would have chosen to fall in love with you, Clint. I don't feel shy around you and that's a plus. Now that I'm getting to know you up close and personal, I've changed my mind on the romantic feelings. Don't be offended. Laura's a lucky woman, and she must be tough as nails to put up with you. You and I are definitely not star crossed lovers._

 _Thanks to my brother, men are a scary thing to me. I've grown accustomed to men that just like to push and shove me around._

 _There's no lost love between me and brother, Ian._

 _I'm free of that._

 _Goodbye brother._

 _You're right, Clint. Oh my god I can't believe I'm saying that. It's true. This is my nice little opportunity to start over._

 _I'm glad you didn't dare me to do something stupid._

 _Romancing an Avenger would have been the ultimate hurdle to jump over. I swear if you even try to make me do that, I will hunt you down and destroy you._

 _Okay, I won't do that, but please don't make me do it._

 _You did give me one tough challenge though. I've already gone through my morning routine, so the next step is to leave my apartment. I need to get through this assignment, and I have a small window of time to accomplish it._

 _You know your way around this Tower better than I do, so you don't need me for the mean time._

 _Enjoy reading my thoughts._

 _Love,_

 _Sammy_

* * *

The sun was rising in the sky.

Sammy was sitting on the helipad outside. She was on the top level of the Avenger's Tower/Stark Industries. She was attempting to clear her mind of her past troubles. Her brother wasn't here to call her a useless piece of shit. She truly believed that these super heroes were good men. She wasn't going to place her old fears on them. She needed to charm one other person on the team. The bitter wind brushed against her face, causing her cheeks to turn a nice shade of pink. The dark curls of her hair whipped around with the breeze. She kept pushing her big glasses up her nose. Old habits die hard. Her tan skin darkened with the exposure to the sun. Tanning wasn't impossible in the cold, but it wasn't pleasant either.

Her goal this morning was to try and contain any old pains from her past.

In her apartment, Clint hadn't packed up every single item in his closet. She managed to steal a black and purple giant hoodie of his, and she was wearing it now. The hoodie had a violet and white arrow emblem in the middle. Her black leggings were comfortable. She was still barefoot because she was too stubborn to actually put on a pair of shoes. She was a small town girl at heart. There were many days she'd spent barefoot on the ranch.

She jumped as she felt someone touch her hair. She reached up to slap the hand away, but she stopped when she saw who it was. Her hand was an inch away from Captain America's pretty face.

"You see? This is why I don't trust you!" Steve Rogers exclaimed. "Are you always such a violent little girl?" He was holding on to her hand, infuriating her even more by the minute.

"Excuse me? I am NOT a little girl," she retorted. Usually she was shy and resigned, but whenever she was around Steve, her blood just started to boil. Her blood pressure was rising. If she were the She-Hulk, she would have smashed his face up by now. The stress caused her to grind her teeth. Her cheeks were a very vivid shade of bright tomato red. Her chest huffed and puffed. With his grip on her hand, she was growing more and more furious.

"I'm in my thirties physically. I'm going to take a guess that you're somewhere in your early twenties. You're not much older than Wanda Maximoff. So yeah, you're a kid," he stated it like he was spewing out facts.

"Technically, CAP, you're old enough to be a relic in a museum, OLD MAN. In my world, super heroes only existed in books and films. Growing up in my childhood home, you guys were my idols. Before you go ahead and judge me for being _violent,"_ she hissed out the word violent. She continued on. "I had a very nasty older brother growing up. He'd hit me and I learned to hit back. With Clint being the only exception so far, I don't like it when people touch me. Do you know why I came up here to be alone? I need a fresh start, and I can't begin to trust you or anyone else if I'm still stuck in my past. Trust isn't given. It's earned. You need to gain my trust, and I need to earn yours. Also, I don't need your pity. My family robbed me of a normal childhood, so don't you DARE call me a child. Do we have an understanding on that part? I AM NOT A LITTLE GIRL!"

His eyes were as wide as saucers. He hadn't been expecting that response from her. From the outside, she just appeared to be so darn innocent. She wasn't a typical beauty, but she had a striking appearance of her own that made her unique. She was the girl that used to get quacked at. Her classmates had referred to her as the Ugly Duckling. She'd been forced to grow up fast.

"You're understood, Ma'am," he said. "You know you don't have to deal with this alone. Did you ever hear about Sam Wilson back home?"

"Yes," she answered.

"It's safe to assume that you know he's the Falcon. He's a great listener. He used to help Army War Vets deal with their post-traumatic stress disorder. Now he's an Avenger. Maybe he can help you get past whatever mental issues you're dealing with." She looked really peeved. "Hey! Don't get mad at me. I'm not calling you crazy. It's just that talking to someone helps. "

"Is that why you came up here to think, too?" she questioned. She shocked him with her sense of perception. "Is that why you were sitting alone in the kitchen last night? Are just pondering over your own problems, too?"

"That's none of your business," he argued. She raised her eyebrow, seeing that she'd touched a nerve. Mr. All American Man wasn't as perfect as he appeared to be.

"How about we make a deal? I won't pick at your scabs if you don't pick at mine. If we ever feel like sharing something with each other, that'll be an internal decision. We won't force answers out of each other. Does that sound good to you, CAP?" she asked.

"For the first time since we've met, we're finally agreeing on something," he pointed out. He noticed that she was trying not to smile. He smirked, knowing that it would only infuriate her more. Half of him hated this new dame, but the other half of him was fascinated by her. It sure as hell had nothing to do with her looks.

She was different.

She softened her fist in his hand, and he loosened his grip on hers. For a brief moment, their palms gently touched. His hand was huge, and hers was minuscule in comparison. She was shaking with nerves, but there was something about this moment that suddenly felt r _ight_. Was he going to be friend or foe? He whispered for her to just breathe through the moment, and she listened. Eventually her posture relaxed. His touch wasn't meant to harm her. He was being nice right now, and she was thankful. Her lungs loosened up, and her breath was falling into a natural rhythm.

"I have to go," she whispered. She felt like she was catching a bad case of the 'feelings.' She needed to stay focused.

"You are so strange," he murmured.

"Well, I think Maria Hill had a point. There's too much testosterone running around this building!" she scrunched up her nose.

"The Avengers were doing just fine without you," he said.

"I won't argue with you on that." She was struggling to break whatever _connection_ she was experiencing right at this moment. Her brain was telling her to run away and run fast, but her body was inching closer and closer. Perhaps, for once, she was trying to prove that she could be the female Hawkeye. His smirk was infuriating. "If Clint hasn't let you in on the plan, I fully intend to become a part of your team. I might not be ready yet, but I will be. You and I don't have to LIKE each other. We just need to be able to work together."

"I admire your confidence," he said. He wasn't sure why he was letting her do this, but she reached out to touch his chest. Her hand lightly rested over his heart. He wasn't exactly as experienced as Bucky when it came to women, but he did have natural instinct. She couldn't believe how warm he felt to the touch. Perhaps that was a side effect of the super soldier serum. He was all hard muscle, while she was kind of soft and pudgy in comparison. She wasn't huge, but she wasn't super fit either. He seemed to be into whatever she was attempting to accomplish. The alarm bells were going off in her head. This was a gigantic no-no. He was going to be her boss someday, and students aren't supposed to fall in love with the teachers. Someday, he'd be falling straight into the arms of Sharon Carter. That thought was enough for her to push him away.

"Rule number one, CAP, don't fall in love with me," she warned him.

His jaw dropped and clenched. She swore that she heard his teeth grind. He was angered by her statement. Women were too complicated for him to understand. First she was giving off these come hither vibes, and now she was running away.

She rushed off before he could even begin to respond. When she glanced back, he looked almost pissed at her. Yeah, she was going to fail Clint's first assignment. Hopefully, Clint wasn't too eager to get rid of her that fast.

Steve chased after her like she'd done him wrong. "What the hell is your problem?" He asked.

"Oh, no, no, watch your language!"

"This isn't funny!" he yelled at her. No matter how fast she tried to run, she knew there was no way she'd out run a super soldier.

"What's wrong with you? One second you're acting like you don't want me around, and then the next, you're playing with my hair! Can we say confusing?" She screamed back. This was so not like her. Usually she was a chill and mellow type of gal.

"Maybe I was right. You're just a scared little girl."

There was the sound of a loud smack.

She'd slapped Captain America.

Worst of all, there was the sound of a laugh coming off from the distance.

The Black Widow had seen the new girl slap a super hero, and she was slightly impressed. The beautiful and stunning Natasha Romanov was laughing.

Clint Barton was right behind Tasha.

"You better keep a tighter leash on her, Clint," Tasha said, laughing as she walked away from the scene.

Like a dog that was picking up their puppy by the scruff, Clint clenched the back of Sammy's hoodie. He was careful not to hurt her, but he wasn't going to let her brawl with Captain America. Sammy wasn't anywhere near ready to spar with any of the Avengers.

Steve dashed away, following Natasha.

Clint was trying to find the right words. He wasn't really mad at Sammy, but it was his job to be her mentor. She was certainly a lot tougher than he'd originally thought.

"You're going to go back to the apartment and cool off for the rest of the day. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Also, I'll be your new roommate for the meantime. I'm not going anywhere until I know you're ready. I want to retire, and I can't do that if you aren't playing your part. Now go, go take a hot shower or nap or whatever you girls do," Clint said.

"I'm sorry," Sammy mumbled.

She turned around and walked down the hallway towards the elevator.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 **Chapter Four**

 **Letter Four- January 4th, 2017- Wednesday**

 _Dear Clint, (Because you and I both know you're the only one actively reading this Diary)_

 _I am the insanity that is Samantha Stan._

 _I could say that I'm sorry about last night, but I'm not. I passed my first assignment, and I managed to charm Black Widow by being an idiot last night. Who knew? I would have slapped CAP a long time ago if I knew it'd make Natasha actually LIKE me. I'm also guessing that you aren't really that mad at me. You just have better self-control than I do. It's not my fault that Steve Rogers doesn't like me. He'll be the one fighting me every step of the way, and I'm okay with that. He's too self-righteous to actually hurt me. Even though I would totally end up with my butt on the floor, I would fight Captain America if it came down to it. I like this new me. No more letting bullies walk all over me._

 _Let's just hope that he doesn't get me kicked out of the Tower._

 _I'm beginning to grow a backbone, like you told me to do._

 _This is my shortest entry yet, but it's sweet and straight to the point._

 _Love,  
Sammy_

* * *

"Hawkeye!" Clint Barton screeched after reading her latest entry. He didn't care about the fact that she was taking a nap.

"What the fuck, Clint?" she asked, rubbing her sleepy eyes. She glared at the archer. When she spotted her diary in his hand, she screamed, "HA! I knew it!"

"Don't be a smart ass, Little Peach!" He was being obnoxiously loud on purpose. She jumped out of her bed, and she landed on his back, causing the two of them to tumble straight onto the floor.

"You're creating a monster," she said in an annoying sing song voice. It was nice to know that she wasn't shy around him. He looked a little bugged by her lack of respect for authority. He was her boss technically. He needed to assert his dominance over her.

"Fine, if you want to have it YOUR way, I have your next assignment ready for you," he informed her. "This one will make you freeze up like a deer in the headlights. Think of this as a test of your courage level. You're going to steal CAP's shield." He grinned as she finally shut the hell up. She appeared to be quite horrified by his request. Good. He needed her to prove her worth. If she could get over this fear, then she'd be prepared for anything.

"Steve will kill me," she said. "IS that what you want?"

He pulled her up with him as he stood up. He placed his hands on her shoulders, and he looked her square in the eye. "Go get em killer!"

"I don't want to die," she groaned.

"You only have till sun down to accomplish this goal," he said, setting the stakes very high. "I'll make Tony Stark pay for your hospital bill if I have to. Go little bird. Papa bird is setting you free." He mocked her with a smile still playing on his lips. Her face was completely drained of any color. Nice. So she was still a normal human girl under all that bravado.

He was testing her negotiating skills. If she was able to talk through the situation with the Captain, then he'd be able to trust her more.

Finding Steve's apartment wouldn't be too hard. The man had a whole floor to himself, and honestly she knew he deserved that luxury. He was a war hero.

All she needed to do was to take the elevator all the way up to his floor.

She wasn't a particularly strong gal in the physical sense. There was no way she'd be able to discreetly carry out his shield all the way to her shoe box sized apartment. How was she going to convince the man to just let her borrow it for a day? "I can do this," she whispered, ignoring Clint as she tried to sort out a plan.

She had three hours till sun down.

She raced out of her place, and she jumped into the open elevator. There was no time to waste. Hell. She was going to wing this and hope it'd work for the best.

Five seconds.

That was all she had until the elevator door would open up to Steve Roger's apartment. The adrenaline rush was addicting, and she felt like she was on top of the world. She was faking this confidence. She had to push her fear aside long enough to accomplish the task. She fidgeted, dancing on the edge of a dangerous line. There were so many routes she could take. She could lie or she could be honest, and she was choosing to go with the honesty route.

One

Two

Three

Four

Five

The elevator door dinged.

She bounced over to his living room sofa, making herself comfortable.

Steve Roger's face was priceless. He'd walked out of his shower, strolling along in just a towel, and out of the blue, there was a tiny little dame on his couch. She didn't even seem to register that he was half naked. This fiery little dame had slapped him yesterday, and now she was making herself at home in his apartment. None of this was making sense to him. He tried not to smile as she broke out into a fit of giggles. She was an enigma, and he wasn't sure he liked that.

She was too different, and he was afraid of something that he couldn't control. Why was Clint so sure that she was the next Hawkeye?

She was being a total dork. She saw the small hints of a smile. Maybe the Captain wasn't as cold as he appeared to be all the time.

"Are you insane?" Steve asked, feeling a blush creep up his body as she eyed him. There was that hint of fatal attraction. He despised everything about this little girl, but something about her was secretly enticing. He tried not to groan when she bit her bottom lip. It was like she hadn't heard his question. He pictured having his way with her, claiming her right where she sat. He walked over to her, experiencing a brief moment of braveness. He towered over her with a hand on his hip to keep the towel nice and secure.

"Oh my god, ewww, Steve, go put some freaking clothes on please!" She tried to act disgusted, but she was extremely turned on by the sight of him in so little. She almost forgot why she was here in the first place. Her heart raced a mile a minute.

"You told me yesterday I wasn't allowed to fall in love with you, but here you are. Now, I can't think of too many reasons why you'd come visit a man unannounced in his place," he said.

"Trust me. That is NOT why I'm here!" she shouted, hopping off the couch and attempting to put some distance between them.

"Your lips say no, but your body says yes, sweetheart," he crooned at her. Captain America was teasing her. Oh how the tables turned.

"Can we like have this talk some other time? I came here to steal your shield," she said.

"Every time I think we're having a decent moment, you just have to go and spoil it! Damn it Sammy!"

"Language!" she cried out.

"This isn't funny!"

"No! It isn't funny!" she shouted. "I have more things to worry about than my own damn hormones, Steve! Hawkeye thinks it's hilarious to send me out on these silly missions. I feel like my head is spinning. My life is completely different from what it was like less than a year ago. I have two and a half hours to get your shield back to Clint. I'm not some sort of petty theft. It isn't in my blood. I just want a life, Steve, can't you see that? Maybe you don't know me well enough yet. Being Hawkeye means something to me. It isn't just another title. I don't want to be the useless thing my brother said I was."

"Just take the shield, Sammy," he said.

"This better not be a joke."

"I'm serious," he reassured her. He walked over to his shield, picking it up, and he offered it to her.

When she picked up the shield, there was a reverence that reverberated in her soul. Tony's dad had sacrificed so much to make that shield. This shield had inspired the creation of S.H.I.E.L.D. A piece of their history was in her incapable hands. "Oof!" she moaned when she tried to carry its full weight.

"Do you need help with that little darling?"

"Shut up!" She used both her hands to get a steady grip on the shield's handle.

"Now this is hilarious," he said, winking at her as she left his apartment.

"You are a piece of work, CAP!" She glanced back at him one more time before the elevator doors closed. "If you can please get your eyes off of my ass, that'd be much appreciated."

"No promises!" He yelled.

As the elevator moved down, she wasn't able to hear him anymore.

"If you're watching the elevator footage, Clint, you owe me! You owe me big time!" she called out into the empty space. She leaned against the wall of the elevator, closing her eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 _ **Since the MCU doesn't really go into Clint's background that well. I'll adlib some of my own story line into his history, and I'll use a bit of the comic book history, too. It'll be a mix.**_

 **Chapter Five**

 **Letter Five- January 5th, 2017- Thursday**

 _Dear Diary (aka Clint!),_

 _I know that you think last night's mission was necessary, but you are wrong, Clint! Last night was embarrassing._

 _You can tell the Captain to pick up his shield at our place._

 _You can't make me go back to his place!_

 _Do you know how hard last night was for a socially awkward person?_

 _No. You don't._

 _I am so mad at you! I'm pissed. I'm angry. I am everything but happy right now._

 _You can feel free to grovel for forgiveness_

 _Love,  
Sammy_

* * *

 **Late Afternoon**

"Little Peach, you haven't spoken a single word to me since last night. I'm sorry, but there is a lesson to learn with every single road block," Clint Barton said. The mental preparation was vital to Sammy's survival. "I believe in you. You are the legacy I'm choosing to leave behind. You are my choice, and everyone else needs to get over themselves." He pressed an innocent kiss to her forehead. She looked all scruffy and a tad bit disgusting. Her curls were all knotted up on her head. She'd yet to brush her teeth, so there was the stench of bad morning breath. He was also learning that she tended to get rashes on her neck whenever she was stressed. She refused to get out of bed, and she was very tense. She was wound up super tight. Most of all, she was as stubborn as a bull. There was a soft spot in his heart for the soon to be female Hawkeye. The frown on her face killed him. He understood that he was enemy number one right now. "I have so much faith in you. Maybe someday you'll surpass me, and I will be so proud of you no matter what happens. If you do manage to spoil our good name, I won't hold a grudge against you for it."

"Damn you, Clint," Sammy whispered, feeling a little bit of the rage slip away.

"You may not always like the outcome, but everything comes at a price. You are being a petty little thing right now, but I forgive you. So, I'm going to kick your stubborn ass out of the bed!" He lifted her up and out without waiting for a response. He wasn't giving her time to protest. "CAP is on his way over here, so you should probably go make yourself look a little more human again."

"What the fuck?" She whined, glaring at him. "You can put me down oh wise leader. Are you saying I look bad?"

"I'm not trying to insult you! Go take a shower!" He carried her away, setting her down in front of the bathroom.

"This is why the team NEEDS more women around. I'm so sick of you men already!" she spat. She was loud when she was motivated enough. Her quirkiness made up for what she lacked for in natural charisma. She was never going to be a smooth Casanova like Tony Stark.

"Go!" Clint barked the order. He was half tempted to literally shake some sense into her. "I'm not bluffing. If you don't listen to me, I will pour a bucket of ice cold water on you. You obviously need to cool down. We can do this the easy way or the hard way."

She sighed before walking into the bathroom. There was so much to work on. There was tons of room for self-improvement. She locked the door before stripping out of her clothes. She allowed the water to heat up before she stepped into the shower. She closed her eyes, lightly touching an old scar on her stomach. The scar was a knife wound. During an argument with her brother, Ian, he'd brought out his pocket knife. He'd stabbed her. He'd tried to kill her. He'd almost snuffed her out. Clint was right, and the guilt was almost unbearable. Clint Barton was the older brother she'd never had. She'd made a lifetime full of mistakes in her past, and there was no time like the present to fix things. She went through the notions of cleaning herself up. When she was done showering, she disappeared into her bedroom to change. She pulled on some grey sweats and allowed her wet hair to air dry. She walked out into the living room. She opened up her mouth to apologize to Clint, but she paused at the sight of Steve Rogers on her couch.

Clint wasn't here.

"I'm not in the mood!" she snapped. Steve didn't look the least bit perturbed by her vicious attitude.

"We could put that mouth of yours to better use," Steve suggested, relaxing into the sofa. "I know that I'm not allowed to fall in love with you, but I'm positive that you my dear have a crush on me. "

"Do you speak English, Rogers?" She was very close to punching a motherfucker. She cursed under her breath as she fidgeted. She never used to have an anger management issue. "You and I are never EVER going to fondue!" She was making a stab at his old lack of knowledge about sex. He just appeared to be highly amused by her use of the word. "Do you comprehend what I'm trying to say? Your orders, solider, was to retrieve the shield and get the fuck out." She was temporarily distracted by the obvious desire in his eyes. There was this out of the blue urge. She imagined straddling him on the couch. It was unfair how attractive one person could be when she was perpetually ugly. She was the girl with the huge freaking nose and huge glasses. She was the four eyed freak.

His lips looked totally kissable, and she knew that she needed to do something fast before she did something stupid.

Oh hell, she was bound to do something stupid anyway!

"There's no use in lying, Sammy." His baby blue eyes had her under his spell.

Anger coursed through her body, and her throat was all scratchy and tight. She'd had enough of the men in the house today.

"Why didn't the universe just let me become a Jedi instead?" she asked, talking to herself out loud.

"I understood that reference! Tasha made me sit down and watch those movies. It's the ones with the cool light sabers in it," he jabbered on and on.

It was like she didn't hear him. She was calculating her next move. As soon as he stood up, she struck. She tackled him head on with her full weight, and she snarled like a cat. There was a low growl coming from her chest. If he wasn't going to leave, then she was going to force him to (with or without the shield). It was like she'd slammed her body into a boulder. He hadn't even flinched. His hands automatically landed on her hips. She was lucky that she hadn't cracked a rib or two. All that hard muscle was pressed up right against her. She was doomed. He was close, and he smelled really good. She closed her eyes.

She decided to hit him in the groin with her knee, and the move caused him to immediately release her.

She dashed away and ran out of the apartment.

She was done for the day.

She needed privacy and space.

She was not going to fall in love with Captain America, and she wasn't planning to become a cliché. He hated her, and somehow she was wildly turned on by that fact. What the hell was wrong with her? Hormones were the enemy. Nothing was making any sense. Love wasn't an equation. There was no obvious explanation. His hot body and cute face was going to be the death of her. Sex changed everything. If she crossed that line with her "Frenemy", there was no going back. She'd want more. She'd crave more. She wasn't the friends with benefit type of woman. She was the kind of woman that a man would be happy to marry someday.

There was not a single soul in the commons area of the tower. She collapsed into the fetal position, and she started to weep. All the pressure had bubbled up into this huge breakdown.

Right now, she was very vulnerable and very human.

* * *

Through the windows, she watched the sun disappear. She was curled up on the white sofa set. Her eyes were all swollen from the crying. The stress rash on her neck was extremely red and itchy. She hiccuped. A gentle hand landed on her back, rubbing tiny and soothing circles into it. Natasha Romanov was quietly singing a Russian lullaby. No words were exchanged. The deadly assassin had a motherly instinct deep down inside of her. Thanks to the graduation ceremony, there was no chance of ever having a kid. Usually Tasha was sarcastic or cynical, but right now, she was allowing Sammy to see a different side of Widow.

It was silently understood that Sammy wasn't going to breathe a word of this to anyone.

Widow helped her stand up, guiding her towards an unfamiliar section of the tower. She was being led to Natasha's apartment.

Sammy's brown eyes wandered around the apartment that was similar in shape, but it was like no one lived here. The apartment wasn't decorated much. There were only the essential things around the place. There was one personal item on the wall. It was a photograph of Clint and Natasha. The word Budapest was scribbled at the bottom. Budapest was a mystery to everyone but Clint and Natasha.

"Clint only wants what's best for you," Natasha said. Her sharp green eyes observed Sammy. Black Widow was so beautiful, even Sammy was feeling a couple of butterflies in her own stomach.

"I know he does," Sammy answered back.

While Natasha had entertained her crush on Bruce Banner, there was a part of her that would always love Clint Barton more. Sammy wasn't stupid. The secret longing in Widow's eyes was obvious. Clint was married with children, and Natasha was a lone wolf. When Loki had put Clint under his mind control, Natasha had panicked. Sammy knew that unrequited love was the worst. The stars were not aligned in the sky.

"Is this really the life you wish to have?" Natasha asked.

"I've never been surer in my entire life." Sammy was positive this was the right path for her. "You didn't choose to become an assassin. Becoming one of the good guys was your choice. This is my decision, too. I don't remember much from my death, but I want to make this new life count for something. I will fight for this opportunity till the day I die. You can trust me."

"When you were still asleep in S.H.I.E.L.D's medical area, I would come to visit you," she said. "It was Clint's decision to bring you home here to the tower. He fought for you, and I pushed his request forward. No one else wanted you here, not Steve, not Fury, or anyone else. If there's anyone's instinct that I trust more than my own, it's Clint's. When you were asleep, the doctors told me to give you space. It was obvious that you were having nightmares. You were completely unaware of the times I'd hold your hand. My touch seemed to soothe you in your unconscious state. Death has left its mark on you, and that will be permanent. I commend you for fighting the good fight."

"I'm just a girl, Natasha, just like you," Sammy said.

"You can stay here for as long as you like," Natasha offered. "The guest bedroom is the first door on the left. Goodnight, Sammy."

"Goodnight, Natasha."

* * *

Sammy turned off the lights and crawled into the guest bed. She sighed when someone rolled down next to her.

"I'm sorry, Clint, okay?" Sammy said, facing the wall and not Hawkeye.

"We're good, Little Peach," Clint responded, staying above the covers to keep the situation somewhat appropriate. "I just didn't want to end the day on a bad note with you. Plus, the apartment was kind of lonely without you. Between you and my kids, I'm so used to the noise."

"Why do you care?" she asked, feeling very raw with emotion.

"I like you," he admitted. "I think you belong here. Every step has led you to right here and right now."

"You really should quit bringing in strays," she said.

"It drives Fury crazy that I march to the beat of my own drum." He leaned against the headboard of the bed, fiddling with his thumbs.

"We make an odd pair."

"Ouch. I think we make an awesome duo!" he exclaimed.

There was a not so subtle knock on the opposite side of the wall, and Sammy vaguely heard Tasha yell "Keep the noise down!"

"You just keep getting me into more and more trouble," Sammy whispered. She rolled her eyes at Clint's grinning face. He thought this was all just the funniest thing. She wished he had his sense of humor. She also wished she had his compassion. Emotions were something she tried to avoid. Having romantic feelings for someone else like Steve Rogers was a no-no. She was struggling with her new reality.

"Is there something you're not sharing with me?" Clint questioned.

"If you're talking about Steve, I'm not answering that question," Sammy hissed.

"It's cute!"

"It's dumb!" she argued back. She buried her face in the covers, refusing to look Clint straight in the eye. He was opening a metaphorical can of worms, and she wasn't prepared to deal with it.

"You at least need to play nice," he pointed out.

"I'm trying."

"Have you ever been in love, Sammy?" he asked.

"No." She'd never let anyone get too close. Her older brother had basically made that impossible. She shivered at the memories of being kept in dark places. She didn't drink because the smell of alcohol triggered too many flashbacks of Ian. He'd made her parents' house smell like smoke and beer. Her bed room closet had been her safe haven. It'd sort of been like her hiding spot. She'd hide and convince Ian that she wasn't home.

"Are you afraid to love?"

"Yes," she whispered, feeling the tears stream down her cheeks. "No one loved me. No one loves me."

"Oh, Sammy," Clint murmured. He pulled her into his side. It was like holding a baby bundled up in too many blankets. "Let it all out, Little Peach." There was a scar on her neck from the car accident that had killed her, and Clint noticed it even in the dark. "I love you, Sam bug."

She wasn't ready to say those words back to him.

He understood.

"Was your childhood just as rough?"

"Have you ever been to New York's Coney Island?" he asked.

"No, I lived closer to the Coney Island in Ohio," she said.

"The answer to your first question is yes. I was raised in the circus with my older brother Barney. Do you want to know why I took to you so fast? You look exactly like the first girl I'd ever loved. When I was thirteen, I met this girl named Angie. You're the spitting image of her. She used to come to my shows at Coney Island every night. I think her and I were too young to understand what true love even was. When I was sixteen, she stopped coming. I found out that she'd killed herself. She'd slashed her wrists open. She was buried with no real memorial service."

"Were you devastated?"

"I was inconsolable for the longest time," he said. "You don't have to worry, Sammy. I'm not love with you, but I do love you if that makes sense." He squeezed her tight. "I promise I won't let anything bad happen to you."

"You can't promise that," she said.

"I can sure try," he stubbornly said.

"I think it's time to catch up on sleep," she mumbled, lolling off to sleep. All the worry lines disappeared off of her face, and she relaxed with the extra body warmth.

"Goodnight, Little Peach."


	6. Chapter 6

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 _ **Since the MCU doesn't really go into Clint's background that well. I'll adlib some of my own story line into his history, and I'll use a bit of the comic book history, too. It'll be a mix.**_

 **Chapter Six**

 **Letter Six- January 6th, 2017- Friday**

 _Dear Diary,_

 _When I came home from staying at Natasha's last night, I discovered a little white rose waiting for me on my bed this morning. I can't run with this feeling. I just can't! Surely this is all just a stupid phase. I have a dumb crush on Captain America, and I don't know what to do about it. I don't believe in love, diary. Romance isn't the way that it is in movies or novels. There are upsides and downsides to every relationship. I can't afford to lose focus. Not now. Whenever I'm around Steve Rogers, I feel ALIVE. I'm terrified of that fact. He riles me up and makes me smile all at the same time. He makes me question everything I've ever believed in._

 _The white rose represents loyalty, innocence, and purity. It's also a symbol for starting over. This new life is technically my rebirth. I might not ever get another chance. This is a once in a lifetime thing._

 _I'm sorry to all the romantics out there (I'm sorry Clint since you ship me and CAP), but the gesture was so sweet that I almost puked. I am a sad excuse for a female. I guess I wasn't born with a romantic bone in my body. I'm not the kind of girl that will sit there and watch The Notebook over and over again._

 _Here's where my morning got even worse._

 _ **Do you want to hang out? You know where to find me. – Steve**_

 _That's the note I found next to the rose. I'm freaking the fuck out. It's not like he's asking me out on an actual date. He's just implying that he wants to get to know me better. I'm not in the habit of letting too many people get too close to me._

 _Do I push aside the physical attraction and take a risk or do I just simply walk away before anything starts?_

 _Any other girl would have screamed a "HELL YES!" and a "Hallelujah!"_

 _I blame myself for not being normal._

 _Love just isn't in the cards for me, and I accepted that a long, long time ago. When my Mother told me she didn't love me anymore that had been the vital turn in my life._

 _When Clint told me in his own platonic way that he loved me, I choked on my response. I can't begin to comprehend why he does._

 _I refuse to say those three little words out loud to anyone._

" _I love you" is a saying that gets thrown around way too much. Some people make a habit of tossing those words around too casually._

 _Even when I lived with my best friend, Sasha Daniels, she just knew I was allergic to anything that surrounded the topic of love. However, she offered to pay for my therapy, and I refused to see a therapist._

 _I still refuse to see a therapist._

 _I am also still allergic to romance (yuck!)._

 _I'm not broken, and I don't need to be fixed._

 _Becoming Hawkeye is my goal. I made a promise to myself, and I made a promise to Clint. I can't be distracted by Red, White, and Blue Hot Pants (I'm sorry, Steve.). I'm not letting a man define who I am in this universe. I'll be super proud of myself in the end._

 _I WILL share the title of Hawkeye._

 _Steve Rogers IS NOT my endgame._

 _He's not my soulmate._

 _He's nothing to me._

 _I'll move on._

 _I don't know what's happening to me. Is there a cure for catching "the feels"? Okay. Maybe I confess that I'm a bit mental in the brain. Is this how Mr. Darcy felt when he met Elizabeth for the very first time? Is there a possibility for a happy ending? What if this ends tragically like what happened to Romeo and Juliet? It's very rare for anyone to end up with their first love. Steve and I would be going against all odds._

 _My brain hurts._

 _Life keeps throwing melons at me._

 _I'm putting this journal away before my head decides to explode. I bid you a goodbye until tomorrow._

 _Love,_

 _Sammy_

* * *

 **Morning**

Sammy paced back and forth around her bedroom like a lunatic. This one decision could change everything. She buried her face in her pillow and screamed. She kicked her feet out. She was like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum.

"Are you dying in there?" Clint hollered out from the guest bedroom next door.

The two were separated by a very thin wall. Again, why was she stuck in this sucky apartment? She sighed because she knew she wasn't worthy enough to have a whole floor.

Maybe she needed a meaningless one night stand. Maybe it'd help her forget Steve.

"It's too early in the morning for this shit," she yelled back.

"You're in denial, Little Peach!" Clint was certain that she'd be tortured by her feelings for Captain. He was prepared for the inevitable explosion. He could tell she was on the brink of falling apart. Learning to love someone wasn't easy. He could tell she was fighting an inner battle.

"I am NOT!" She screeched. She entered his room without knocking. She frowned when he busted out laughing.

"Why are you so defensive? If Steve really means nothing to you, then it shouldn't matter what I have to say," he said. "I am older than you, therefore I am wiser. Listen to your teacher, Little Peach. Steve's a nice guy. He's the perfect all American dude. He'd be lucky to have someone like you. Dating you is a privilege, and you better fucking make sure that he knows that. You're a spitfire, but you're also just so damn innocent. Some days I just want to pinch your cheeks. You need to quit denying what's right in front of you. Love is all about taking risks. You'll never find out unless you put yourself out there. Take a chance on him."

"If I let Steve Rogers love me, he'll break my heart. If he breaks my heart, I'll never recover," she said. "Nothing is meant to last forever. His duty is to serve the people and to protect the people. I would only be a distraction. He'll get tired of me. He'll find someone prettier or sexier than me. I'll be nothing but a ghost in his past. I don't want to lose him. It's better this way. It's better if he hates me."

"He doesn't hate you."

"Yes, he does," she argued. "He doesn't want me around nor does he need me. He told me he was perfectly fine without me."

"We all say things we don't mean," he said. He pulled her into a super tight bear hug. She was trembling like a spooked Chihuahua. Here was the meltdown he'd been expecting. Her chest puffed out. She was on the verge of crying. She was one of those ugly criers. Snot was threatening to come out from her huge nose. The tears stained her chubby cheeks. She had chipmunk cheeks. The tears poured out of her like an endless waterfall.

"What if I don't deserve to be Hawkeye?" she questioned.

"That's blasphemy."

"Is this some sort of weird test?" she asked, wondering why he hadn't sent her out on another dumb mission.

"I'm teaching you to trust your own judgement. Sunday is your first day in the gym. I'll have a hardcore workout ready for you. You can train your body to be strong. You also need to be mentally prepared. You have to be smart. This isn't all about punching the bad guys."

"You're insane," she said. She buried her face into his shoulder. She despised weakness, but it was better to let her frustration all out.

"I'm just smarter than you." His ego was the size of a hundred football fields. "Trust me. I'll be here for you always. Even when I'm not physically here, I'm just a phone call away. "

"I'm scared," she admitted.

"You are going to turn around and leave this room. Go do something fun and normal for once in your goddamn life. Those are my instructions for you for the day."

"Aye aye, boss," she muttered.

She was thankful for having Clint around.

She braved the waters, and she exited the apartment.

"I worry about her," Clint whispered to himself. He watched her walk away, and he hoped that she'd listen.

* * *

 **Afternoon**

Sammy was standing in front of the elevator.

She was just as crazy as Clint Barton. Following his advice was the last thing she'd wanted to do, but here she was considering Steve Roger's offer.

What was the worst that could happen?

She wasn't in the right state of mind to face Captain America today.

She wasn't ready. She walked away and straight out of the Avengers' Tower. Everything in New York City was so big. She sometimes missed the simple small town life. She probably would have married out of obligation and not love back home. She was afraid of turning out just like her Mom. Home had been a nightmare. All those memories were bottled up. Each memory was placed on a shelf in her brain. Once in a while, she'd remember the demons in her closet. She'd look at her scars and remember. She was oblivious to the danger of walking alone in the streets of a city. She wasn't paying attention.

The cold bitter wind of winter was blowing. She was wearing a Stark Industries sweater.

Someone grabbed her and pulled her right into an alleyway. One hand covered her eyes, and the other one muffled her screams of protest. This stranger assumed that she was very important. She was hanging around the Avengers. His hands released her once she was in the alleyway. He shoved her up against the brick wall of the building.

"Did you miss me, little sister?" Ian Stan whispered into her ear. His dark hair and wild blue eyes were just as she remembered. He was bigger and taller than her in every way.

She froze because this wasn't possible! Instead of panicking, she slowed down her thoughts. A knife was being held just above her throat. He should have been locked away in a prison a long, long time ago. He was a very sick individual.

"I am not afraid of you," she said, holding her stance. She wasn't going to give into fear this time. She was going to play this smart. She gradually moved her hands behind her back. She was doing this blindly. She slowly moved her finger towards her watch. Her watch was connected via Bluetooth to her cell phone. She didn't know whose number was programmed at the top of her list. She just pressed call on the first contact she discovered. She wasn't a big believer of religion, but she prayed that someone would answer.

She turned down the volume so that Ian couldn't hear.

He didn't notice what she was doing.

"Samantha Stan, do you want to know how I got here? I slashed my wrists the day after you died. How could I possibly live without you?" he snarled. He sounded like the devil in the flesh. "I didn't know where I was when I woke up. The first thing I saw in the distance was the Avengers Tower. This is all pure coincidence. I didn't die with the intent to find you. This is where life has led you. It's led you straight into the clutches of death. I was disappointed when you didn't die by my own hands. I'm obligated to end this once and for all. Everyone in the town was devastated by your death except for Mom and Dad. Because who could love someone like you? You are hideous."

"Did you know about me before today?" she questioned.

She had to buy time.

"Honestly, no I didn't. It must be my birthday because you've just made me the luckiest man alive," he murmured against the side of her head. Their temples met. He was pinning her against him. There was no wiggle room. She was stuck.

When Ian was abruptly yanked off of her, she didn't hesitate. She sprinted towards the closest street.

She watched a man in a red and yellow iron suit. Iron Man had tracked down her signal, having no idea who she was, but she'd had his number. He'd heard the sounds of her distress. He watched the little punk dash away in the opposite direction of his sister.

Ian was gone.

Iron Man should have chased the little bastard, but he wasn't ready to leave this girl alone. He was clueless that she was THE Samantha Stan. She was Hawkeye in the early stages of training. He recalled Barton saying that she was destined to be an Avenger. He had no idea that this little angel was Samantha. He carefully approached her.

For the second time in one day, a sob erupted from Sammy's throat. She appreciated Iron man's silence as she attempted to compose herself.

"Who are you?" Iron Man asked. He stepped out of his Iron Man suit. Tony stark was dressed up in an Armani suit. He yanked a handkerchief out of his pocket, offering it to her. Her eyes silently thanked him as she wiped away the last of her tears. She'd disrupted one of his pretentious parties. He liked to live large. He was and would forever be an arrogant man.

"Sammy Stan," she choked out. Her voice was tight sounding. She looked very rattled by what had just taken place.

"From what I've read of your file, I don't need to tell you my name." Tony Stark offered his arm to her. "I'll walk you home, kiddo."

"Thank you, Tony," she thanked him. There was no way she'd hate the man that had just saved her. She wrapped her arm in his. "I owe you."

He grinned like a Cheshire cat.

"I hear the team isn't that fond of you," Tony said. "I swear I've raised an army of buffoons. I wouldn't mind being around you."

"I'm not going out with you, Tony, if that's what you're implying."

"You said you owed me a favor. I'm just collecting," he pointed out. Dammit, he was right. "No strings attached. I'm not asking you to marry me. It's just one date."

The pair reached the safety of the tower.

"I'll think about it."

* * *

 **Night**

"Am I really so awful to you?" Steve Rogers asked. He'd bumped into her on her way to the kitchen.

"It's not you. It's me," Sammy answered in a monotone voice. After today she just wasn't in the mood. There was a shit ton of things weighing down on her. Maybe Tony was again RIGHT. It was just one little casual date. Around Tony, it was easy. Around Steve, there was real emotion there.

"What is wrong with you?"

"Everything!" She yelled. She didn't care who was eavesdropping or listening. "I've had a shitty day."

"That doesn't give you permission to be mean."

"Captain America God's righteous man. You're just too damn nice to call me a bitch," she said.

"I don't think you're a bitch," he replied, earning the hints of a smile from her.

"You're just a better person than I am, then." That was her simple answer. She wasn't good enough for a man like Steve.

"You're Hawkeye in my eyes," he said. "I was wrong in the beginning."

"It's too late, Steve."

"Why is that?" he questioned.

"You and I can't happen." That was all she had left to say at the end of a terrible day.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 _ **Since the MCU doesn't really go into Clint's background that well. I'll adlib some of my own story line into his history, and I'll use a bit of the comic book history, too. It'll be a mix.**_

 _ **Also, I'm dipping a little into the original MCU Fantastic Four films (Chris Evans who plays Captain America also played Johnny Storm.)**_

 **Chapter Seven**

 **Letter Seven- January 7th, 2017- Saturday**

 _Dear Clint/Diary,_

 _By the time you're reading this, I'll be gone. Don't worry your pretty little head, I will be back. You need to understand why I have to do this. I know my brother is only human, but he's the worst kind of human being out there. I can't continue to be Hawkeye if I'm dead, and I know my brother will never stop till I'm dead._

 _I'm not alone. I have Tony Stark with me. I'm sure that's not much of a comfort to you or Steve. I'm positive Natasha will kick my ass when I get back. I'm sorry, but I value my life and the air I breathe. I need to leave and tie up my loose ends._

 _I need my brother locked up for good. Unlike my brother, I'm not willing to kill him. I'm not stooping to his level. He's a murderous, cold blooded killer. He's a danger to society. He's a monster._

 _If Prison 42 in the Baxter Building exists in the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU is the nickname of your world back where I 'm from), I'm having the Fantastic Four put my brother in there where he can't hurt anyone._

 _Please don't fret. I'm so sorry._

 _Love,_

 _Sammy_

* * *

The sun was rising in the morning sky. Sammy tossed her journal on to her bed, not bothering to hide it. Clint was asleep in the room next door. She glanced at her reflection, deciding that she looked respectable enough. It was now or never. She exited her apartment. She quietly walked out of the tower, jumping into a sleek black SUV. She borrowed one of Clint's old hoodies again. The black and purple hoodie displayed the Hawkeye symbol.

"Good morning, kiddo," Tony Stark greeted her with that trademark grin of his. "When you walk into the Baxter building, you ARE Hawkeye. It's the only way they'll take you seriously. Can you handle this?"

"Tony, I'm willing to do whatever it takes," Sammy answered.

"You aren't taking baby steps, and this is a gigantic leap. Are you really ready for that?"

"I'm aware, and I'm ready," she dryly answered. She placed sunglasses over her eyes, blocking out the waves of the morning sun. For once her hair was brushed back. Her curls were straightened, and her dark locks of hair were pulled into a sleek ponytail. She was wearing a light amount of makeup. She'd gone from ordinary to a little above average in looks. She'd accepted a long time ago that she wasn't the prettiest. She was not an extraordinary beauty.

"You don't fool me for one second. You aren't as happy and cheerful as you pretend to be. I think deep down inside you're tortured by your past, and you're terrified of your brother," Tony said. "If you're thinking about the probability of jumping out of this vehicle, I suggest you don't." She closed her eyes, refusing to look at him at the moment. "You pretend that you don't believe in love, but there's a hidden part of you that craves it. How do I know this since I just met you yesterday? I did my research, and I may have read Clint's digital copies of your journal entries so far."

"You did what?" she questioned. She was enraged by this news.

"I read your diary."

"Nothing is sacred," she mumbled under her breath. "If you're really so worried about me, why did you bring me here?"

"Because when I look at you, I see everything that Hawkeye stands for," he answered. He'd assisted in the creation of Prison 42. He also agreed that her brother was a liability.

"I'm not a hero."

"None of us were born heroes. Our choices and decisions are what led each and every one of us here. It's what brought you here," Tony said. He gently pulled at the end of her ponytail, fixing it up. She was like the innocent little angel of the group. He'd be the first to admit that he wasn't a nice guy. Pepper had had every right to leave him. As for the woman in front of him now, Sammy was different. Her heart was pure and true. He didn't ask her out purely based on physical appearance. "On the upside, everyone's gradually warming up to you. Maybe you're the one that will melt the Popsicle that's stuck up CAP's ass."

"TONY, you did not just say that. Ewwww! "She crinkled her nose in disgust. THE GPS on her phone indicated that they were close. "I need space to think, so please be quiet."

"You're the only woman that's immune to my charm." Tony fake cried, rubbing his eyes. She rolled her eyes at his childish antics. She was tired. She'd barely slept a wink last night. The nightmares were brutal, and her brother was no longer just a metaphorical ghost in her closet. He was here. She wasn't going to let him haunt her for the rest of her young life. There was so much she wanted to do.

"Tony, I know that you're not the most liked person either, but I think you deserve to be happy. I know you're retired, but what have you really accomplished lately? I know for fact that you throw the best parties around. I also know that you're an arrogant son of a bitch. You and I aren't so different from each other." She knew about the stint he'd had. She recalled how the alien invasion in New York had affected Tony big time. "You're hurting, too, on the inside, and you're hiding behind walls. You and I just have different reasons for our walls."

"My offer to take you out still stands," he said. "I take your silence as a maybe."

"You have arrived at your destination," the GPS announced.

Happy Hogan was silent in the front seat. He occasionally glanced back at Tony.

Sammy's jaw dropped at the sight of the 35 story building. She was sweating, and she cursed her anxiety issues. She knew that the Fantastic Four was open to taking requests from people in need of aid. A part of her wished Steve was here. She was in over her head. She pushed the thought away because Steve Rogers hated her down to the core. She wasn't wanted. She was like the stray dog that Clint had taken in. "Put a leash on me and call me Lucky the pizza dog," she mumbled under her breath.

Tony ignored her strange use of words, and he walked out of the car, running around to open her door for her. "Be strong, kiddo," he reassured her, giving her a huge slap on the back that caused her to cough.

"Jesus Christ, Tony, are you trying to kill me?" She snapped.

"That's your nerves talking. Shut up and act like an adult."

She clenched her jaw, and she stormed towards the entrance of the Baxter building.

The secretary at the front desk on the first floor picked up the phone on the desk. "Mr. Richards, your guests have arrived," she quietly said into the phone. She appeared to be way in over her head, too. The secretary was timid and shy. She looked too sweet to be in a job like this. No one was safe around super heroes. Everyone in the super hero business was a liability.

A stranger tapped on Sammy's shoulder. "I thought Hawkeye was a bad ass dude, not some chick," the Human Torch said, eyeing the wide eyed girl. He lightly tugged at the sleeves of her Hawkeye hoodie.

"You're the notorious, cocky Johnny Storm," Sammy mocked, shoving his hands off of her.

"I'll go find Reed," Tony Stark said, glaring at Johnny. "You stay put, Hawkeye." He wasn't waiting on Reed to come down. The clock was ticking. Too bad she wasn't great at following rules.

"Did you have a sex change?" Johnny asked. "You don't look like Clint Barton."

"I'm the female Hawkeye, and you will refer to me as such," Sammy said, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration. She wasn't getting paid to deal with all this testosterone.

"I want your real name," he demanded, following her as she started to walk towards Tony in the distance.

"I'm Hawkeye."

"That's your alias!" he argued, following her like a lost puppy dog. "I'm just trying to get to know the new girl on the block. Frankly, you're being a bitch." The Human Torch resembled Steve Rogers in appearance. The two could pass for identical male twins. The different was that Steve had morals, and Johnny was always looking for trouble.

Ever since she had dropped into the MCU, she'd shed the shy girl persona. Clint Barton's infamous attitude was starting to rub off on her.

"It's official. The universe hates me, and this is my own personal hell!" Sammy exclaimed.

"WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" a familiar voice boomed from behind her. There was a very angry Captain America following her and the Human Torch. When she'd pictured CAP being by her side, she'd imagined a more calm and collected CAP.

"Fuck me," she groaned. "You FOLLOWED me here! I need to do this! Both of you back the fuck off!" She was fuming with fury. "This is why the only person I trust is CLINT BARTON. Do you hear me? He trusts me, unlike everyone else. I trust him."

"Are you in love with Clint?" Steve accused. "Is that why you won't let me into your world? Are you pining away over an unattainable man?"

"NO! Now, if you don't get out of my face man in the spangly costume, I will fight you right here right now. I'm not afraid of you!" Sammy was wound up tighter than a rope. "You want to fight! Bring it on!"

"Woah, woah, woah, both of you stop!" Johnny intercepted. He used his body to block her from physically attacking Steve Rogers.

"You're being ridiculous. The Avengers can help you just fine. You don't need to reach out for help," Steve said.

"The new generation of Avengers isn't ready. They're still training. You can't send them unprepared into the field. I'm sorry, but this is my choice," she said. "Maybe you guys can work out a compromise with the Fantastic Four." She was aware of events that had yet to happen. In Civil War, Wanda Maximoff hadn't been ready for the war. Her mistakes had costed other peoples' lives. Her intentions had been good, but the results of her actions had been disastrous.

"She does have a point," Johnny interjected.

"Stay out of this!" Steve shouted. There was a strange possessiveness to his tone of voice. His goal was to drag an unwilling Sammy back to the Avengers Tower where she'd be safe. He'd almost lost her once, and he wasn't going to allow it to happen again.

"I'm following Tony. You two can go ahead and have a pissing contest," Sammy said in a monotone voice. "I'm not changing my mind."

She marched away from the two stunned men. Looking at her was almost painful to Steve. She was a spit fire type of girl, and he admired her braveness. He just wasn't very fond of that mouth of hers. She was one of those loose cannons like Barton. Sooner or later she'd become a human weapon. She was being trained by one of the most deadly assassins out there. Clint Barton was a legend of S.H.I.E.L.D despite being more trouble than he was worth.

Johnny barked out an obnoxious laugh, earning a harsh glower from Steve. The all American hero was oblivious. "You obviously know nothing about the art of wooing a girl like her," Johnny Storm said.

"What's it to you?" Steve asked, feeling a little insecure at the way Johnny was watching Sammy's retreating figure.

"It's nothing to me," Johnny answered. "You're stupid, man."

"You don't know me and you don't know her."

"I don't see her worshipping you," Johnny said. "Good luck, soldier. Isn't the hero always supposed to get the girl?"

* * *

"Mister Fantastic I presume," Sammy politely greeted, shaking Mister Fantastic's hand.

"You can call me Reed," Reed politely said, giving her hand a firm squeeze. "Tony here tells me you're in need of assistance."

"I need your help," she said.

* * *

Hours passed.

Tony was making plans with the Fantastic Four downstairs, and Sammy was exploring the roof. The 35th level was terrifying due to the massive height of the building. She needed time to clear her mind. Her focus was on a certain super soldier, and Steve Rogers was a deadly distraction. She was going to die if she wasn't careful. With Ian out there, a relationship wasn't even a question.

"Sammy, please," Steve said, carefully approaching the wry female Hawkeye. The look in her eyes was one he'd never seen before. "Just come home."

"You want me to leave with you?" she asked, placing her hands on her hip. She scoffed. "This is my life on the line. I'm not jeopardizing that for you. You HATE me. You've been treating me like shit since day one. You haven't given me a single reason to trust you."

"If it came down to it, I'd choose you. I've been horrible to you," he admitted. "I'm not leaving you behind. Widow can hold the fort for the mean time. I'm staying with you."

"You're willing to follow me into battle?"

"Yes," he answered.

"Steve," she sighed. If a woman sighed like that, clearly, he was doing something wrong. "I can't ask you to do that for me. The Avengers need you. I'm asking you to leave."

"Sammy, please," he pleaded, sounding desperate. When she started to move away, he grabbed her hand, forcing her to pause in her steps. She turned her face away from his view. Tears glimmered in her eyes. All her breath was gone, and her heart ached. "Why are you like this?"

"It's who I am. I'm not willing to change for you. I'm not putting you in the center of my universe. "

"Let me stay. Let me be your friend. Just throw me a bone here," he begged. He collapsed to his knees, burying his face in her stomach like a child in distress. The level of vulnerability was intimate. She was full on crying now. Why was this so painful? Why couldn't she be normal and just love him? She ran her fingers through his bright blonde hair. Those blue eyes stared up at her.

"You can stay, Rogers."

* * *

The sun was setting in the sky. The day had been excruciating long. From her guest room in the Baxter Building, she pulled out her phone, and she dialed the one person's voice she needed to hear.

"Are you okay, Little Peach?" Clint Barton asked, not saying hello. This wasn't a casual phone call she was making.

When she tried to choke out a response all that escaped was an ugly sob.

"I'm on my way," he said without hesitation.

She didn't want to be alone not today. She was paranoid and frightened. What if Ian figured out where she was?

In less than an hour, Clint entered the room, pulling her into a brotherly hug. The Archer wasn't abandoning her in her time of need. The hour was dark. Yesterday, she'd almost been killed, and he hadn't been there to help her. She was helpless, and that was his fault. It was time to accelerate her training. She wasn't going to die under his watch.

He'd make sure of it.

Her panic slowed down, and she started to loll of. Barton carefully placed her on the bottom mattress of the bunk bed. He climbed up onto the top bunk, and he pinched the bridge of his nose. He was worried. The sound of her soft snore indicated that she was finally asleep. When he peeked down at her, she looked so peaceful. She looked like a kid in her twenties. She was young. She reminded him of his own daughter.

Ian was going to pay for his crimes.

Clint had never met her brother, but he hated him already.

No one was going to hurt his Little Peach.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 _ **Since the MCU doesn't really go into Clint's background that well. I'll adlib some of my own story line into his history, and I'll use a bit of the comic book history, too. It'll be a mix.**_

 _ **Also, I'm dipping a little into the original MCU Fantastic Four films (Chris Evans who plays Captain America also played Johnny Storm.)**_

 **Chapter Eight**

 **Letter Tenth- January 10th, 2017- Tuesday  
Baxter Building**

 _Dear Diary,_

 _I have nothing to say._

 _Love,  
Sammy_

* * *

Clint Barton was reading through Sammy's daily diary entry, and there was basically nothing. He narrowed his eyes at the girl in the lower bunk. Those steel grey eyes demanded answers from her, and she sighed in response. It was almost creepy how they were able to communicate like that. She was in another Hawkeye hoodie she'd stolen from him. There were shadows under her eyes. She was super fidgety, and she wasn't acting like her normal self. For once her hair was down in its natural dark curls. She looked like a different Sammy. She wasn't wearing her big dorky glasses.

"Tony's been working night and day to track my brother's whereabouts. No one knows where he is," Sammy whispered in the darkness of the guest bedroom.

"Have a little faith," Clint said.

"It's been THREE days! It's like my brother is some sort of super human. He's just a normal guy."

"He isn't normal, Little Peach. He's a killer!" Clint screamed at her.

"I am well aware of that! You don't get to yell at me! We're partners, aren't we? We're supposed to be equal," she scoffed. "He's out for blood, Clint. Ian isn't going to stop with just me."

"You are my partner, Sammy," he said, looking down at her. "We'll find him, and soon he'll be locked up forever."

"IF I die, who would even care?" she asked.

"I would," he answered. "Don't I matter to you?"

"That's not even a question….Of course I care!" She clumsily climbed up to the top bunk of the bunk bed. She almost slipped on the ladder, but she managed to regain her balance. She glared at the chuckle that came from above.

"Did you ever feel truly loved in your old world?" he questioned. He knew he'd struck a nerve as she flinched in response. "I'm sorry for asking."

"No, its fine," she breathed out. "When I was dying in that hospital bed, I wondered about who would miss me when I was gone. My best friend loved me, but she had her own life. My parents and I never reconciled. I realized that I was going to die alone. When I closed my eyes, I drifted off into a dream. I saw someone waiting for me. There was a man at the end of the path. There was no light. It was all just pitch black darkness. I knew I wasn't dead yet, and it was all just a dream. But, I recognized a face. "

"Who was there?"

"Steve Rogers," she said. "He was dressed in his full Captain America suit. He told me that he'd be the one to save me."

"Don't you think that means something?"

"It was only a dream," she argued.

"What if it isn't?" he asked, pressing the issue. "He obviously cares a lot about you. If anyone cares about you more than I do, it's him."

"I'd only end up breaking his heart," she said. "That's the end of this conversation."

Clint was curious about why she was so afraid to just openly love someone. He lightly pinched the apples of her cheeks, attempting to make her smile. She rolled her eyes, but a tiny smile graced her lips. He tugged her into a hug before helping her climb back down. She was so much like him with her attitude problems. He remembered the first night she'd awakened in the Avengers' Tower. She'd found one of his old bow and arrows in the training room. She'd snuck out of her hospital room just long enough to explore. She'd been screwing and messing around, but when she'd held that bow, he'd seen the possible future. After she'd come back to her hospital room, she'd collapsed back into her resting state. Right then and there he'd known that he'd made the right choice in picking her.

He'd seen the female Hawkeye.

If she died again, he wasn't going to let her face death alone. He'd help her connect to others on a more emotional level. She needed friends, real ones. He'd be there for her.

She needed to feel loved.

"Just like day one, I still have faith in you," he told her. Once her feet were placed back safely on the ground, he ruffled her hair like an annoying brother would do to their little sister. "You've been doing great in the gym here in the Baxter Building. You have a long way to go, but you are getting there my little tadpole."

Before Sammy was able to speak, there was a ringing sound coming from her cell phone. She hit accept without looking at the screen and pressed the cellphone to her ear.

"I have an idea. We need to draw your brother out. Party time, kiddo," Tony Stark said. "He's the shark, and you are the bait. It's perfect."

"If this is what it takes, then I'm all in," she agreed.

"Are you sure you can handle this?" he asked.

"I'm positive." She wanted this to end. "I still owe you a date, Stark. The problem is….i don't have anything to wear."

"Are you asking me to send you on a shopping spree?"

"Yes," she said with a laugh. "I mean I could just show up in jeans and a t shirt, but I don't think that's your style, Iron Man."

"I can't have my date looking all scruffy."

"You're something else," she said.

"I'll have Happy drive you out tomorrow morning," he said. "Have a good night, angel face."

"Goodnight, Tony," she said. "You don't have to try so hard."

She clicked the hang-up button. What if the plan failed? If there was a huge party though, her brother wouldn't be able to resist the opportunity to drink endless amounts of alcohol. Also, he was dog determined to spill her blood.

Clint had overheard the conversation. He wasn't going to let anything happen to her at the party. He assumed the party would be at Stark's Tower. The Avengers needed to draw in a huge crowd. His Little Peach was the target. He watched her pace around the room deep in thought.

"I don't want to die, Barton," she sniffled. "I like being in this world. This could go extremely great or drastically wrong."

"We're in this together," Clint said. "I'm not going anywhere without you at the party. The Avengers will have your back." He was a master assassin. He'd kill for her if necessary. In his eyes, she was practically like a sister. He'd do the same for his own family and friends. It was his job to protect and serve. He was an Avenger and soon enough she'd be one, too. She'd learn to fit in just fine. He was super confident about her being the female Hawkeye. Plus, he'd get to see his family more with her around.

"We're in this together," she whispered to herself. She was terrified down to her bones, but she'd put on a brave face. "I'm counting on you."

"So why did you say yes to Tony and not Steve?" he asked.

"It's not like I'm in love with Tony Stark. It's just one harmless little date," she said. "I owe him for saving my life. It's not like there's any strings attached. He's just a friend, Clint."

"I'm worried about you," he said.

"I'll be okay." She placed her hands on his shoulders. She looked him square in the eye with confidence. "Team Hawkeye, remember? We've got this."

"I'm still worried," he stated again.

"We're in this together," she repeated once more. "You don't need any more worry lines on your face."

"You're lucky I love you, kid."

* * *

"Do you ever get any real decent sleep?" Johnny Storm asked, stalking Sammy around the Baxter Building. Her curiosity was worse than that of a cat. Honestly, he was a bit fascinated by her. She was wandering around the building with no specific path in mind.

"Do you not have anything better to do?" Sammy fired back with that question. She wasn't ashamed of the fact that she was in pajamas. She'd put her huge glasses back on. Her curly hair was all puffed out and wild. Her eyes were a little red from lack of decent sleep. Whenever she managed to fall asleep, there were nightmares waiting for her.

"That sassy mouth of yours is going to get you into so much trouble," he said. "Tell me, how are you an Avenger? You don't seem like the type."

"Has anyone ever told you that you ask too many questions?"

"You're deflecting," he argued.

"You're just plain annoying," she told him. "Can we not just have a normal conversation?"

"You left the realm of normal a long, long time ago, Hawkeye."

"At least Hawkeye sounds cooler than the Human Torch!" she yelled.

"Will you two just shut the fuck up?" Clint Barton yelled from a distance. She couldn't see his face, but she imagined that Clint's face wasn't very pretty. "You two are worse than my kids. I swear you both need babysitters at this point."

"I told you that you'd get into trouble!" Johnny smeared that fact in her face. He managed to block her flying fist, and he swiftly pinned her to the ground. "You aren't as tough as you talk."

"You disgust me," she said.

"I still like you," Johnny said with an evil grin. "I want to know more about you."

"Get off of me!" She kicked his side as hard as she could, and she managed to squirm away. "You are so dead, Human Torch. I'll find a way to get back at you!"

"I'd love to see you try, sweetheart," he said, grinning back at her. This was all in good fun. There was no bad blood between them.

"I want to go outside. Will you walk around with me, doofus? It's not safe for me to walk around here at night, at least not with my brother around."

"Are you asking me out on a date?" he dramatically gasped, clutching at his chest in fake surprise. "You should really buy me dinner first before trying to get in my pants."

"Oh my God, you wish! I'm trying to be nice, so will you help me up?" she asked.

"I think you're all kinds of perfect, honestly. You should come join us here. Just leave Mr. Spangly Pants behind," he said. He offered her his hand, and he helped her stand back up on her own two feet. "Your sense of humor is top notch."

"Quit flirting and start walking," she commanded, shoving her hands into the huge pocket of her hoodie.

"Why won't you tell Steve how you really feel?"

"How do I feel?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"You're falling in love, and you haven't realized it yet," he said. "You're in stage two: Denial!"

"Shut up and walk."

* * *

There was a local band performing at a nearby bar. Sammy paused to listen. It sounded like the band was performing outside on some sort of outdoor area. Tons of people danced to the music. There was the sound of laughter and pure joy. It was unlike anything she'd ever experienced. Back in her old world, she'd pretty much kept to herself. At one time she'd been a dancer in a band. When she'd turned twenty one, she'd started to perform on stage. She'd sing and dance. Now she was just boring twenty three year old Sammy. She wasn't the same woman she'd been back then. She'd never experienced what it was like to be a part of the crowd. She'd never had a guy ask her to dance on the dance floor.

"Where are you from, Sammy?" Johnny questioned.

"I died in a different universe, and I woke up here," she answered. "It's a long and very boring story."

"Little Buddy, I don't think anything about you could ever possibly be boring," he said, placing a friendly arm around her.

"Are we friends?" she asked.

"I thought we'd skipped the friendship stage and go straight into best friends for life status," he said, smiling down at the shorter super hero girl.

"You don't want to be friends with me."

"Yes, yes I do," he said, feeling very tempted to slap some sense into her. "Quit hating yourself so much. Enjoy life. Be spontaneous!"

"Are you calling me boring?" she asked, looking a little insulted.

"Yes."

"Come on, we should probably start walking back," she said.

"Save me a dance at Stark's party," he told her, escorting her back to the Baxter Building. "After dancing with me, you'll forget about poor old Steve."

"Can we not talk about him, please?"

"No," he said.

"I hate you."

"Shut up and walk," he mocked, not flinching when she punched him in the arm.


	9. Chapter 9

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 _ **Since the MCU doesn't really go into Clint's background that well. I'll adlib some of my own story line into his history, and I'll use a bit of the comic book history, too. It'll be a mix.**_

 _ **Also, I'm dipping a little into the original MCU Fantastic Four films (Chris Evans who plays Captain America also played Johnny Storm.)**_

 **Chapter Nine**

 **Letter Eleven- January 11th, 2017- Wednesday  
Baxter Building**

 _Dear Diary,_

 _Today is possibly my last full day alive._

 _My new outfit is hanging in my very small guest bedroom closet. At least I'll die looking fabulous. Everyone keeps telling me that I'll be alright, but nobody knows my brother like I do. There isn't an ounce of kindness in Ian's soul. I repeat…..he IS a monster. My brother is insane. He's mean and ruthless. He's the phantom from my childhood, and whenever I have nightmares about him, all I can see is the scared and younger version of me. I picture every cruel thing he's ever done. His words are melted into my veins like poison. Every time I get naked, I can see Ian's lovely reminders on my skin. The scars run deeper than skin deep. He's like my evil half. At least villains have motives._

 _Ian is just a cold hearted beast._

 _Clint, I don't want you to be disappointed in me. If I don't make it through tomorrow, I just want to say that I do care about all of you guys. You ARE the brother I've always dreamt of having. I really hope that I'll get to meet your family someday. This guest bedroom is lonely without you in it. I know you're doing recon at the Avengers Tower. I don't know how much you'll find about my brother. Ian and I weren't born into this world. I should have gone back with you to the tower, but I need time to think. I need to mentally prepare myself for tomorrow._

 _Wish me luck._

 _This is the end of the beginning or the beginning of the end._

 _Love,  
Sammy_

 _P.S. Make sure to leave behind a cool memorial statue of me in N.Y.C. if I don't make it. If not, I'll haunt you for the rest of your life as a ghost. I'm not kidding. I'm completely serious, Clint. Fulfill my last wish._

* * *

A knock alerted Sammy to someone's presence outside the door. Her eyebrows furrowed. She thought Johnny and the other Fantastic Four members had all gone to bed. Her heart thundered at the sight of Steve Rogers. He appeared to be half awake, rubbing at his eyes. What was he doing up so late? Her mind was completely scrambled. There was no strength left in her to fight Steve today. She stopped looking through the peephole, and she finally just opened the door. He somehow managed to look so perfect in his half asleep state. She felt like she looked like a rag muffin. If this was really her very last day, what was she going to do with this opportunity? She was sick of fighting and arguing. Her next move was so unlike her. She gently pulled him into a hug.

She wasn't going to be the mean bitch tonight.

He'd chosen to stay because of her, and she wasn't going to be ungrateful for that. She was happy that she wasn't completely alone.

"You can stay on the top bunk," she said, allowing him to enter the room. "Are you okay?"

"I just had a bad dream is all," he answered, entering the room. He was dressed in a white t shirt and grey sweat pants, and he managed to still look like a super model. She wished she was blessed with naturally good looks.

He was an attractive man, and she wasn't entirely unaffected. He noted her silence and gazed back at her. It was like the two had been zapped with electricity. There was an ache in her core as she squeezed her thighs involuntarily together. She was biting her bottom lip, and his eyes immediately dropped down to her mouth. Was she going to taste as sweet as she appeared? The lights in the room were dim, but his bright blue eyes weren't easy to hide in the darkness. Her face was flushed. His hands landed on her hips, and she practically jumped sky high. She was a bottle of nerves. His thumbs lightly rubbed circles on her hip bones, causing a pleasant sensation. What was she doing? She should have pushed him away. Normally, she'd be screaming for him to get away.

"I'm innocent," she squeaked out. She wasn't an experienced seductress. She was still a virgin, and she was a little embarrassed by that fact.

"That's not something to be ashamed of, sweetheart," he told her, trying not to scare her away.

Another knock sounded on her door, and she pulled away from Steve. All he'd done was touch her, but she was already super flustered.

"I know you're awake in there," Johnny Storm said from the other side of the locked door. He was dog determined to have his way. The honest truth was that he was too cocky for his own good. It was a miracle that his ego fit inside of the Baxter Building. Deep down inside of his asshole appearance was a good man.

Steve wasn't ready to give up quite yet, and he carefully moved her back towards the front of his body. She almost gasped at what she was feeling. She couldn't decide if this was heaven or hell that she was currently in. She was as red as a tomato. She hated to admit that she liked what she was experiencing. He wasn't just some awkward, little boy. Captain America was all man, and she liked how masculine his body felt beneath her hands.

"Now is NOT the time, Johnny!" she yelled, trying to sound as normal as possible. When Johnny proceeded to knock on the door, she groaned in frustration. She almost involuntarily kicked Steve.

"You can't stay locked up in that room all day!" Johnny screamed back.

Sammy did the only thing she could do, and she lightly shoved Steve into the darkest part of her room. She wasn't going to give Johnny the satisfaction of seeing her in a compromised position. She opened the door, stepping out and closing the door tight behind her.

"Are you crazy?" she questioned, poking Johnny hard in the chest. "It is the middle of the freaking night. Unless you're here to make some sort of romantic declaration of love, I don't see the point of you interrupting my day."

"Is it really that difficult for you to just let people in? You push everyone away, and then you wonder why you're so lonely. I came here because I'm concerned, alright? I was worried about you, so sue me!" Johnny exclaimed.

She really was a frigid ice queen. Guilt dripped inside of her. She was the most selfish human being on the planet. Unshed tears gleamed in her eyes. She barreled right into Johnny's chest, and she just started to cry. She'd tried to stay strong for so long, and she really regretted not following Clint to the Avengers Tower. She was left with a bunch of men that confused the hell out of her heart.

"I'm sorry," she choked out.

"Being a super hero doesn't mean you have to act so tough all the time. Unlike the rest of us weirdos, you're human. Being human is a gift. Your humanity is what makes you special," Johnny said. "Though if you tell anyone how fond I am of you, I'll have to incinerate you."

"Geez, you're such the charmer," she mumbled. "Women should just be lining up at your door!"

"Your sarcasm is not welcome here."

"You love it," she said. She wiped away the leftover tears with the sleeve of her hoodie. "I'll be okay, really."

"Tomorrow isn't the end."

* * *

When she re-entered her guest room, she almost cooed at the image of Steve fast asleep on the top bunk bed.

Maybe Johnny was right…she'd survive the party tomorrow. What was unfolding between her and Steve was something she hadn't quite figured out yet. Was this just a mere crush or more? Maybe destiny was real. She'd been put into this universe for a reason. She climbed into her own bunk, curling up into a tight little ball. She closed her eyes and listened to the soothing sounds of Steve's breathing.

Her cell phone dinged.

 **Unknown Number: Watch out little sis. I'm coming for you.**

That fucking bastard was trying to bully her.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Any songs I mention I also don't own. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 _ **Since the MCU doesn't really go into Clint's background that well. I'll adlib some of my own story line into his history, and I'll use a bit of the comic book history, too. It'll be a mix.**_

 _ **Also, I'm dipping a little into the original MCU Fantastic Four films (Chris Evans who plays Captain America also played Johnny Storm.)**_

 **Author's Note: I'm sorry for my somewhat long absence. I kind of had to learn how to put myself back in Sammy's shoes.**

 **Chapter Ten**

 **January 12, 2017, Thursday**

 **Avengers Building- The Day of the Party- Part One**

 _Dear Diary,_

 _I'm in my room back at the Avengers' Tower. Tonight's the big night. I'm already dressed, but I'm not emotionally prepared to leave my bedroom. The dress I bought courtesy of Tony Stark is beautiful, and I almost feel like a princess in it. I ditched the dorky glasses and put in some contacts. Usually makeup isn't my style, but I put a little on to make myself look less pale and tired. My appearance is all just a façade. On the inside, I'm beyond frightened. I've been training a little with Clint, but I'm nowhere near prepared to take on an actual opponent. I despise having to depend on other people. I should be able to protect myself. I wish I was more like Natasha._

 _If I live through this, I swear I'll never let myself feel this scared and defenseless again._

 _I want to be a bad ass super hero._

 _I want to make this second chance at life count. Miracles are hard to come by, yet I was granted a miracle. I'm alive. Hundreds would wish to be in my place. I'm that one in a million miracle. I'm not dead in a coffin and buried in the ground. My heart is still beating inside of my chest. Yet, I'm not the same person I was before I'd died._

 _I'm not naïve and innocent._

 _I was forced to grow up fairly quick._

 _I'm going to quit stalling and go downstairs. It's early, but if I sit here for any longer, I'm going to go insane._

 _Love,  
Sammy_

* * *

As Sammy walked to the commons area, she paused as she heard the sounds of a piano. The lights in the room were dimmed except for a tiny lamp on top of a baby grand piano. She raised her eyebrow at the sight of Iron Man tickling the ivory keys of that piano. Cher and Peter Cetera's 'After All' was drifting and traveling throughout the room. Tony Stark's eyes were closed, burying himself in the music. She wondered if he was thinking about Pepper. In his fancy smancy suit, he looked so dapper. Inside of that arrogant son of a bitch was a man with a heart. He'd screwed everything up with the love of his life. His ego and fear had gotten in the way. He'd been too blind to see what was right in front of him. He was a real life jack-ass.

Sammy's heart was aching. Hearing someone's pain was not fun. This was the beauty of real tragedy.

She leaned against the nearest wall, and she just listened. This was an unknown side to the infamous Iron Man. In the Marvel Universe, it was hard NOT to fall in love with these characters. Tony was using her as a way to fill that empty space in his life. She knew who he truly loved in this world. She really hoped things would work out between him and Pepper someday.

"I know you're there, kiddo," Tony called out.

"I was trying not to be rude," she said, stepping out into the light. She joined him on the piano bench, admiring the beautiful instrument. Music had always spoken to her over the years.

"Do you want my advice, Miss Hawkeye?" Tony asked, putting an arm gently around her shoulder. "I think you have a bigger heart than what you let on. You act like this tough gal, but I think deep down inside you're also still just a girl. If you don't start letting go, your regrets will start piling up. You'll wonder about the 'what ifs' instead of just taking a risk. You need to live your life. You're so young, and there's no reason why you should be bitter about life already. I don't want you to end up like me."

"You're not a bad person, Tony," she said.

"The fact that you can feel love and compassion is what separates you from the evil in this world," he said. "You're not a bad person either, Samantha Stan."

For a few moments, she basked in the comfortable silence. She was enjoying the calm before the storm. She closed her eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. It was time to put on her big girl act.

This was her time to prove herself as a worthy, up and coming super hero.

She was finally ready to face the music.

The show must go on.

* * *

The tower was filled with hundreds of strangers. Everything about this party was extravagant and glamorous. Then again no one expected anything less from Stark Industries. Lights twinkled throughout the room. The sound of champagne glasses echoed throughout the ballroom area. The DJ was playing all the latest hits. Couples were dancing the night away. Romance and excitement moved through the room like an electric current. Laughter filled the atmosphere.

Instead of blending into the crowd, Sammy was the striking lady in bright red. The corset hugged the small curves of her torso, and the skirt dramatically flared out, falling a few inches above her knees. Her ruby heels sparkled under the lights of the room. Her dark curls were pinned into a braided up-do. She nervously fidgeted. She smoothed out her skirt and tried not to look nervous.

"Would you stop that?" Clint Barton lightly slapped her hands and handing her a glass of sparkling white wine. "You look perfect."

"You don't have to lie to make me feel better," she pointed out, taking a tiny sip from the glass in her hand. She savored the sweet taste on her tongue. Her body started to warm up, and a light blush graced her cheeks.

"You need to quit putting yourself down," he scolded. "Just learn to take the compliment. Also, I would never lie to you ever."

"Never?" she asked, searching into his steely almost gray-blue eyes.

"You can trust me, Little Peach."

"Hawkeye squared forever, right?" Sammy asked, smiling as she looked at Clint.

"Yup," he replied, setting her glass down on a table. He guided her towards the dance floor, and she was thoroughly surprised as he started to lead her through a proper waltz. She was used to men that either didn't know how to dance or men that "thought" dancing was a good idea after a couple of beers. He wasn't sloppy or sleazy. He was graceful and proper.

"Wow! How come you never told me you could dance?"

"A super hero doesn't have to reveal all of his tricks," he said with a grin. "You never bothered to tell me that you're a dancer, too."

"There was a time when all I cared about was dancing. I danced in a band for about a year, and then Ian injured my left foot. I still feel pain in the ball of my left foot. My dear brother managed to destroy the nerves in some parts of my foot. I had no choice but to quit," she answered. She was used to feeling phantom aches in her left foot. "I was able to dance, but the pain was too much some days."

"You shouldn't have to give up the things you love because of some monster." He twirled her around, catching the attention of most of the ballroom. He hated to hear those sad stories of her past. It was moments like this where he liked making her smile. She reminded him a lot of his own children, except she wasn't a child. She was a grown up woman that deserved the world. She deserved to be happy.

"You may be a pain in the ass, but you're a good man," she said, curtseying at the end of the dance, and he bowed back respectfully. There was a light applause, and she blushed at the attention. "I'm going to get myself a new drink and hide!"

Clint shook his head as she walked away.

* * *

Nothing was happening. There wasn't a single trace of her brother, yet she felt like she was being watched. A tingle rippled up her spine, and she bit her lip. She'd lied about getting wasted at this party. If it came down to her and Ian fighting, she wasn't going to allow him to have the upper hand. She wasn't going to let him kill her while she was drunk and trying to have a good time.

The party was still booming.

She noted that Steve Rogers was quick to avoid the dance floor. She knew Captain America was waiting for that right and perfect partner. Usually he'd at least socialize, but just like her, he was hiding in a remote corner.

"I thought Tony was supposed to be your d _ate_ ," Steve sourly said, refusing to look her in the eyes.

"Tony and I are just friends," she said, frowning. Why was Steve always like this? There were times where he'd show that loveable side but right now wasn't one of them.

"I'm the only guy you consistently push away!"

"That's because I actually care about you, Rogers!" she yelled, trying not to cause a huge scene, but she was furious.

"You're a liar," he said.

"I came over here to be nice," she hissed. "But if this is how you want to be, then I'm done! I'm so done!"

"Sammy," he whispered, but she already began to walk away.

Could this night get any worse?


	11. Chapter 11

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Any songs I mention I also don't own. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 _ **Since the MCU doesn't really go into Clint's background that well. I'll adlib some of my own story line into his history, and I'll use a bit of the comic book history, too. It'll be a mix.**_

 _ **Also, I'm dipping a little into the original MCU Fantastic Four films (Chris Evans who plays Captain America also played Johnny Storm.)**_

 **Author's Note: I'm sorry for my somewhat long absence. I kind of had to learn how to put myself back in Sammy's shoes.**

 **Chapter Eleven**

 **January 12, 2017, Thursday**

 **Avengers Building- The Day of the Party- Part Two**

Sammy started to run as fast as she could away from Captain America.

Normally, Sammy was a no alcohol type of gal, but she'd stolen a bottle of champagne. She started to down the bottle like it was her last prayer. Besides the one sip earlier, she usually liked to avoid alcohol like the plague. The alcohol reminded her of Ian.

She wasn't thinking about the consequences like she had been earlier in the night.

When it came to Steve, Sammy felt like she was in a horrible Katy Perry Song (Hot n' Cold). She was almost able to make her escape, but a hard body caused her to stop in her tracks. Tears started to stream down her face, and she was embarrassed! She was humiliated! Everyone at the party had stared at them. This was her life and her reputation on the line.

Steve halted her in her tracks, blocking the entrance of the hallway leading to all the apartments.

"Sammy, please wait!" Steve pleaded, trying to show in his eyes just how sorry he was.

"Shut up! You shut the fuck up, Steve Rogers! How DARE you call me the liar? You said if it came down to it, you'd choose me. You said you would choose me always. You promised to follow my lead into this battle. You're the liar! You have no right to tell me what to do you fucking bastard!" She screamed at him. Her voice cracked, "You lied to me."

She shoved her fists into his chest, taking him by surprise.

"Please, doll," he softly said, attempting to calm the furious female in front of him.

"These last few days you've been so different. You fooled me into thinking I could trust you. You've been so sweet, kind, gentle, and apologetic. I thought we had a connection. Obviously, I was wrong. Shame on me for thinking you were a good man. I cared about you! I tried to protect you. You can't even begin to understand the danger of my current situation. Also, you have no right to be jealous about the men I'm friends with. I'm not your woman, and I'm certainly not your property. You are my Captain and leader, and I will follow whatever PROFESSIONAL orders you give me. But the bottom line is you don't get to tell me what to do outside of the workplace. We're not friends anymore, Rogers. I HATE YOU!"

Since Steve obviously wasn't going to move out of the way, she ditched her high heels and sprinted in the opposite direction. Once she was outside of Stark Tower, she just walked in a random direction. She needed to clear her head. She wasn't in the right state of mind. Nervous hives were blotched on her neck. She wasn't paying attention to where she was going. It was late at night. The streets were emptied. There was no sign of human activity.

"You're still that same over emotional creature," a familiar voice said, hiding in the shadows. "Did you really think I was going to walk right into that obvious trap? You don't belong in this world. You don't belong anywhere. If I go to hell, I'm taking you with me, little sis."

She slowly started to reach for the gun in her thigh holster. She was way past being modest at this point.

"Ian, this is a pretty big universe. It's pathetic that you're going out of your way to stalk me. You have your own stupid life to live. Both of us can't survive the war. Only one will stand in the end, and that person isn't going to be you!" She raised her voice at her older brother.

When she was seconds away from pulling the trigger, she was swiftly disarmed by Ian. He shoved her against the wall of a dark alley way.

"Little sister finally got some moxie! I'm not going to kill you quite yet….No that would be too damn easy for you. "

"Who are you working for?" she hissed.

"You're not the only one that's making friends around here," he said, grinning at the look of distress on her face. "Tell me, sis. Does that foot of yours still hurt? Story is that the injury no longer exists, but the phantom pains are there. I think we should have a repeat performance. Everyone loves a good encore."

The clear horror in her eyes excited Ian.

He pinned her upper body against the wall, and he slammed his foot down hard on her left foot. The ball of her foot shattered, and she screamed at the top of her lungs for help. She'd left her purse at the Tower. There was no way to call for help. He stomped again until he heard a few more bones crack. He crushed her head against the wall, causing her body to crumple and fall. She fell limp as she passed out. Before her eyes closed, all she saw was her brother placing a mocking kiss on her forehead.

* * *

She was awake and totally helpless.

The moon was all the way up in the sky. She'd left her watch, phone, and anything that could have been traceable. She had lost hope on being rescued. Her head wound was bleeding profusely. This was the bitter end for her. No more tears were shed. All she felt was emptiness on the inside. Her heart was broken in more ways than one. She was struggling to keep her eyes open. Gentle hands cradled her head, being careful not to hurt her. She should have been afraid, but she wasn't. She'd slipped into total defeat. The light in her eyes was extinguished. The man holding her picked her up.

"I'm so sorry, Sammy," Clint Barton whispered, keeping his own emotions in check. He was seconds away from falling apart. When he'd seen her on the ground, he'd thought she was dead. As a mentor, brother, and friend, he'd failed to protect her. "Please just hold on for me."

If only he'd ran after her right after she'd left. The regret was eating away at his insides. Hatred pulsed through his veins. He was going to kill that son of a bitch that called himself her brother.

With the amount of blood that was leaking from her head wound, she felt like she was dying. The world was slowly fading to black. "I'm sorry," she slurred her words. "I'm so tired."

"Sammy, you have a concussion, and you need to stay awake," Clint pleaded, gently shaking her.

"Please, just let me rest for five minutes," she begged, feeling like she'd fallen down the rabbit hole.

Even as hard as Clint had tried to keep her conscious, she passed out.

* * *

Sammy's hospital room was dark. The doctors had fallen into the routine of waking her up every half hour. The concussion was taken very seriously. She had stiches from the gash in her head. She was freaked out by the fact that her left foot was completely numb. There was no sensation in the ball of her foot and big toe. The bottom half of her foot was tender and ached. She'd been so stupid and reckless. She'd lost her mind. Her crush on Steve had caused her to become brainless. She blamed Steve Rogers. Every inch of her was filled with hatred. This was the very last time she'd let herself feel this way. She cried like there was no tomorrow. There was a possibility that she'd never be able to walk on that foot again.

Steve's apologies had fallen short on her lips.

Unknown to her, Steve was sitting in the hallway outside of her hospital room. The nurses hadn't bothered to kick the famous Captain America out. Sammy's moans of pain sliced at his heart. He'd crushed the spirits of an innocent woman. In this moment, there was no hate in his body towards her. He'd screwed up. Deep down he knew it was more than a physical attraction. He genuinely cared about her. Somehow he'd managed to push her away. Seeing the light disappear from her eyes had been terrifying. He'd ruined her life. Selfishly, he wanted her forgiveness. He longed to hold her in his arms. He needed her.

"What are you doing here, Rogers?"


	12. Chapter 12

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my original characters. Any songs I mention I also don't own. Keep in mind that this takes place in the MCU universe. This OC will be the female Hawkeye in the MCU. In the Comic Universe, I totally adore Kate Bishop. I don't plan on having my OC be exactly the same as Kate. I ask that you try to separate the two. The dates may not match up, but I'm going to have this happen pre-Civil War.**_

 _ **Since the MCU doesn't really go into Clint's background that well. I'll adlib some of my own story line into his history, and I'll use a bit of the comic book history, too. It'll be a mix.**_

 _ **Also, I'm dipping a little into the original MCU Fantastic Four films (Chris Evans who plays Captain America also played Johnny Storm.)**_

 **Author's Note: I'm sorry for my somewhat long absence. I kind of had to learn how to put myself back in Sammy's shoes. Also, these chapters may not be long, but I'm expecting this to be a 100+ chapter story.**

 **Chapter Twelve**

 **February 5** **th** **, 2017, Sunday**

 **Avengers Building**

Sammy was depressed.

Nothing had been written in her diary for almost a month. The fire inside of her had been extinguished. Her brother had basically disappeared off the grid, and that thought of him being out there on the loose frightened her. Damn Ian! Fucking bastard had no life. She was convinced that Ian lacked a soul.

She glanced down at the fracture boot on her left foot. She was barely able to get around. The nice doctor had told her that if she didn't properly rest her foot, there was a chance she'd need surgery. If she had surgery on her foot, she'd never be the same again. Becoming an Avenger was possibly off the table. Her throat tightened at the thought.

"Sammy, please talk to me!" Steve Rogers begged, knowing that she never wanted to speak to him ever again. He'd treated her like shit. He was shocked when she pulled a knife on him. Of course he'd chosen the kitchen of all places to confront her. She knew this wasn't a fight she could possibly win, but she wasn't going to back down either. She was tough as nails, and she needed to be in order to survive in this world.

She held the knife to his throat, searching his eyes for any type of sincerity. She wasn't pleased by what she saw. There was pity in his eyes and guilt. She didn't want him to feel sorry for her!

"Hey! Children! Put away the weapons!" Tony Stark barked, raising an eyebrow at the tiny angry woman. Her rage was a force to be reckoned with, and even he wasn't dumb enough to provoke her. He glared at the two of them like they were misbehaving toddlers in his home. This was HIS tower. He'd created everything inside of this empire. He wasn't the official leader of the Avengers, but in reality, he kind of actually was the man in charge. If they were going to live here, they needed to have respect. This was his house and his rules.

"She started it," Steve protested. His bright blue eyes widened in surprise. All he could see in her eyes was blood lust and anger. She clearly wasn't in the forgiving mood, and she didn't release her grip on the knife. She knew he could easily try to disarm her. He was a super soldier, and she was just a human.

"I know you don't know much about women, but a woman is always right. Also, I wouldn't argue with someone that's in the perfect position to stab you," Tony advised. "She is an Avenger, just like the rest of us. Show some respect, Cap."

"Are you pulling my leg here, Tony?" Sammy asked, keeping her eyes on both men in the room.

"You're already in the database, kiddo." Tony was dead serious, and carefully he coaxed the knife out of her hand. Unknown to Sammy, Tony was the one that had confronted Steve at the hospital. He'd given the Captain/the Leader of the Avengers a piece of his mind. He cared about her a whole lot. She deserved the official title of Hawkeye. She just happened to be out of commission for the moment.

"Thank you, Tony," she whispered, but her anger wasn't waning. She wasn't going to let either of them see her cry, not ever again. She settled herself back into the electric wheel chair that Tony had made for her. She could walk in her boot, but she used the wheelchair for longer distances. She just needed to get away. It wasn't safe to leave the tower, and she was catching a horrible case of cabin fever. She felt like she was trapped. It was like she was drowning, and there was no one to throw her a lifesaver. She was a little songbird stuck in a very large but fancy cage.

She closed her eyes and tried to control her temper.

She started to wheel away.

Steve was following her back to her room in the tower. He needed to make peace with her, but she wasn't willing to grant him that forgiveness. He didn't deserve it! She was close to her room, but she hadn't been fast enough. Steve had caught up with her. Right now in this second, it was just the two of them.

"I know I broke all my promises, but I didn't lie to you about the way I feel!" Steve exclaimed, not caring about who was eavesdropping on them. He wasn't going to hide his feelings about her any longer.

"How do I know you aren't just going to lie to me again? What are you going to say to change my mind?"

"I love you, Sammy," Steve confessed.

Her breath hitched and she froze. Not a single emotion flickered across her face. Steve slowly fell to his knees so that he was at eye level with her in the wheelchair. His right hand cautiously brushed her cheek. Her skin was so soft but pale from lack of sunlight. There were dark circles under those deep brown eyes of hers. His fingertips lightly traced her lips, wondering if they tasted as sweet as they looked. He buried both hands in her midnight black curls, and he gradually leaned in. He didn't kiss her on the lips. He pressed a very chaste kiss to the corner of her mouth. He wrapped his arms gently around her torso. He wished he could take back every mean word he'd ever said to her. She felt so small and fragile in his arms. He'd done this to her. He'd broken her heart. He'd torn the woman he loved apart. He'd spend the rest of his life trying to make everything up to her. He'd protect her best that he could. She tensed in his arms for a moment before she relaxed. She felt so defeated and lonely and sad.

In a moment of weakness, she clutched on to him like he was her lifeline. He was her one weakness in this world. She didn't say she loved him back. She wasn't sure if she was prepared to forgive him. She knew deep down in her heart that she loved him very, very much, but she wasn't ready to say those words out loud. There was a spark between them. Her body ached to give into temptation. She pushed those urges aside.

"I need space," she requested.

"You take all the time you need," Steve said, kissing her forehead before walking away. It wasn't total forgiveness, but it was a start. Before he disappeared out of sight, he spoke, "You're one of the toughest women I know, Samantha Stan. You don't take crap from anyone. You aren't afraid to defend yourself. Even if the odds aren't in your favor, you don't back down. You remind me a lot of myself….before I was a super solider….back when I was just a kid in the army. Looks like I'm officially your boss now. Not a lot of people had faith in me. Originally, I had my doubts about you, but I was wrong. I was downright horrible to you. I know if my Ma were here, she'd give me a good whopping for the way I've been treating you. I can't promise to eliminate the fear out of your life, but I can help you try to rise above it. Use that fear as motivation to fight. You'll always have a special place in my heart, Hawkeye."

A light blush graced his cheeks before strolled off.

She was left completely alone with her confusing and conflicting thoughts and feelings.

* * *

After a long needed nap, the original Hawkeye had awakened her to take her on a walk around the tower.

The electric chair was for her to use when she was by herself, but the other wheel chair Hawkeye had gotten for her was for people to push her around in.

"Welcome to the Avengers, Little Peach," Clint Barton said with a grin. He was pushing a less fancy wheelchair he'd acquired for her, helping her get around the whole tower. He knew she needed to feel like she wasn't stuck in one place.

"I don't know if I can do this anymore," Sammy mumbled.

"You're letting your fear and depression talk for you. I know you like the back of my hand. Hell, I heard from Tony that you were ready to sumo wrestle poor, Steve, in the kitchen. You're such a little heart breaker!" Clint teased, ruffling her curls.

"It's not my fault you men piss me off," she said, trying not to smile but she couldn't help it. Clint always had a way of bringing out the best parts of her. He was like her brother, friend, and father all wrapped in one. Then there was Natasha that was kind of like a motherly/sisterly figure to her. In the beginning everyone except Clint had despised her, but slowly but surely she'd started to become a part of the family. She was no longer the black sheep of the group. She was one of them now. She just hoped she'd live up to their expectations. She didn't want to disappoint the team. Fate had led her here, and she wasn't going to argue with the God that had given her a second chance at life. She was a brat but not an ungrateful child. This was where she was meant to be, and she'd fight for her rightful spot.

"When you're feeling better, I'll bring you down to the farm to meet the rest of my favorite girls," Clint said. "Once I'm done training you, I'm leaving all the responsibility to you, but I won't leave till you're ready. But anytime you need me, I'm here. I'll always be a phone call away."

"Don't expect me to do house chores," she said with a grin.

"I love you, kiddo," Clint said, lightly squeezing her hand.

After a few hours of walking, he dropped her right back in their co-joined room.

"I'll be right back!" Clint said, dashing out of the room. "Don't wait up for me. I have some errands to run."

* * *

She was alone and the room was as black as a panther. The darkness consumed her.

She removed the fracture boot and sighed with relief. The stupid boot wasn't the most comfortable thing in the world.

She stumbled to her bed, and she lied down. There was so much on her mind.

That little kiss from the corner of her mouth from Steve had ignited a feeling within her. The twenty three year old young super hero was sexually frustrated. Her virginity was a gift she'd yet to give to any man. For a while, she thought she'd been immune to the opposite sex. When she closed her eyes, she imagined his hands all over her body. She was currently stuck in a fantasy. She imagined storming into his apartment/floor of the tower and taking what she wanted. She imagined him letting her have control of his body, straddling him and feeling his hardness pressed up against her.

Under the covers, she timidly explored her own body. She touched the most sensitive parts of herself, and a breathy moan escaped her lips. She was aiming for a release.

How long was she going to be able to resist Steve Rogers?

She knew she was doomed.

 **AN: I wrote this late at night. I tried to proofread it as best as I could. The chapters aren't always long, but I need you to know that I plan for this story to be a 100+ chapter story. I'm just releasing the story is small bursts. Your dear author has gone through several surgeries over the last half of the year. I'm a walking health disaster, and I'm only in my 20's. I have the failing body of an elderly woman. That's why I haven't been posting every week like I used to. I promise to eventually get back on a regular schedule.**


	13. Author's Note

Keep an eye on my profile. This story hasn't turned out the way I'd originally planned for it to be, but I have a whole new vision for this character, maybe with a possible love triangle.

This isn't goodbye to Samantha Stan.

You can expect the new revamped version to have some similar aspects, but I also plan for it to be totally different.

I just feel like I'm not doing her character justice. This rough draft has kind of helped me form a more solid idea of what I want for this story.

Keep an eye on a new version of this story.

It'll be posted to my Author's Profile when I'm ready to post.


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